Hello everyone, I trust you all doing great. Today, I will be discussing in details about " traditional marriage in Nigeria" having spent time with my parents , a close Igbo friend, and doing some research.
In Nigeria,marriage is something beyond the association of two people, it is the association of families and their predecessors. Traditional marriage is the longest type of marriage. A little findings of mine has shown that couples who did traditional marriage are most likely to have a happy family. Below are the process of traditional marriage in Nigeria focusing on the Yoruba's and igbo's
THE YORUBA'S
For the Yorubas, the association of man and spouse starts with romance. Initially, a man identify a lady he is keen on. Then, at that point, he asks his companions or a common companion to move toward her for his benefit. The go-between individual or companion is called an "alarina"
When common interest and love has been set up, they inform their parents of their intention to get married. The man's parent would then visit the lady's family to request their daughter hand in marriage and also set a wedding date, ones conditions are met. This introduction stage is known as "Mo mi I mo e" (know me and let me know you too).The payment of bride price is likely arranged at this stage.
The big day(wedding day) is a day of celebration. After the celebration, the lady is accompanied to her husband home by loved ones to the doorstep of her new home in a custom called "Ekun Iyawo" meaning 'tears of the new bride'. This is to show that she is miserable leaving her famly. At the doorstep of her new home, she is prayed for and her legs are washed. It is accepted that she is washing each misfortune that she may have brought into her new home away.
THE IGBO'S
The Igbo marriage start with a request known as "Iku otherwise known as" "Iju ese" which means "coming to ask". The man, along with his dad or the oldest relative of his family, visits the lady's family. At this gathering, the man's dad says his child's interest in marrying their daughter . The lady is then called out by her parent and asked as to whether she knows her admirer and wish to wed him. If she responds with interest, they would continue to the following stage.
The following gathering will be between the husband to be family and the lady family - known as "Umunna". This gathering is significant because the man's family needs to resay their interest in marrying their daughter, in the presence of her Umunna (immediate and extended family). Ones premission has been granted, dates for the wedding will be set . The husband to be takes a couple of gifts, for example, kola nuts, palm wine, beer, soft drinks, tobacco, snuff and a goat which will be divided among the husband to be and lady's family.
Following the subsequent visit, the husband to be family can now continue with the bride price negotiation referred to as "Ime ego". The man's family request the engagement gifts list which changes from one family to another in Igbo Land.
The money paid as bride price is small. It is the additional gifts to be brought that make up the bigger price for the bride to.
The last stage is known as the wine-carrying ceremony or "Igba Nkwu Nwanyi". This is done at the bride to be home. . Before the ceremony, the husband to be will introduce the engagement gifts list and others necessary gifts to the Umunna before the ceremony starts.
The feature of Igba Nkwu Nwanyi is the point at which the lady openly brings up the man she needs to wed. The bride's dad or oldest uncle (in the event that her father is dead) prays for the bride, at that point, he gives her a gourd of palm wine to find her husband. It is the best custom for her to search for her better half while being occupied by different men welcoming her. When she observes the husband to be, she then, at that point, offers him the wine while on her knees. If he takes a taste, it means to the group that he his her husband , this traditionally makes them husband and wife.
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