Painted with watercolour, 2017

It is good to love many things
for therein lies the true strength
and whosoever loves much performs much
and can accomplish much
and what is done in love
is done well.

Vincent van Gogh
& Self Portrait 1889

The above quote was an excerpt from one of the letters he wrote to his brother Theo, a total of 903 surviving letters, which is now a precious window to his universe of love, whispers, and sanity — just as it was for him during the height of his mental illness.

For many, he is an epitome of mad genius, whom at one point sliced his own ear with a razor blade (which was then presented to a prostitute!), propelled by unspeakable inner demons and his desperation for emotional liberty. Having alienated by the society and sold only one painting out of 900 paintings and about 1,000 sketches in his lifetime, it is only in the modern age that people see the paintings of hallucinatory yellows and blues in bold strokes as the embodiment of creative malady, inseparable from his mental state.

For me, I would like to think that he was just a man who loved and wanted to be loved. It was his wholehearted belief of human capacity to love which did not reciprocate, that drove him to the brink of fatal breakdowns and desperation. If I had a time machine, I would recreate a romantic scene in Café Terrace, invite him for a slow dance on the cobblestones and sing him Despacito 😅

You know, despacito, slowly...

I'd always thought this song brilliantly depicts what I would say to Vincent:

Now I understand
What you tried to say to me
And how you suffered for your sanity
And how you tried to set them free

They would not listen, they did not know how
Perhaps they'll listen now

For they could not love you
But still your love was true
And when no hope was left in sight
On that starry, starry night

You took your life, as lovers often do
But I could've told you Vincent
This world was never meant for
One as beautiful as you

I could've told you Vincent, this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you.

Of course, ending the post with Don McLean:

Thanks for reading! Please feel free to shower me some love ~~before I cut my ear off~~ ❤️️🌟 and let me know if you would like more of these watercolour paintings of notable people!

有看我的自我介绍贴的，应该都知道我是梵谷的~~吃米粉~~痴迷粉。我对梵谷的爱是一见钟情的。他的自画像里阴郁的眼神有种魔力，一直都梦绕魂牵。

西奥，梵谷的哥哥，一直是他经济和精神上的支柱，两者通了近903封信；除了他的作品之外，这些保存下来的信件，是仅仅通向梵谷的宇宙的窗口，让世人得以了解他细腻的情绪、宽容的爱，和精神上的屈服与崩落。自己最喜欢他在其中一封信里，说：「在爱中完成的事，皆是完美的。」

对很多人而言，像《A Beautiful Mind》里的天才数学家约翰.纳什一样，梵谷是疯狂的天才。就如狂人会做的事，他用刮胡刀把自己的耳朵切掉，将之送到一个名叫蕾秋的妓女面前。画中绑着绷带的自画像（1889）是他从医院回来后给自己画的。他的疯狂被当时的社会边缘化，是个在世时只卖过一幅画的潦倒画家，一生默默无闻，到最后精神分裂，一切都似是似非。

在我看来，梵谷只是一个想爱与被爱的凡人。感情上的坎坷一直让他本身信仰的大爱消散，他的爱一次又一次地被排挤到世人绝不相容的境地，直到精神崩落的边缘。

如果我有一台时光机，我会回到一八八八年九月十六号，位于普罗旺斯的夜晚露天咖啡座，制造一个浪漫偶遇的机会（简直是脑残粉哈哈）。我会邀请他在鹅卵石街上跳一支舞，把头轻轻靠在他的肩头上，然后在他耳边呢喃 Despacito—— 慢慢来，不要急～

我一直觉得 Don McLean 的 Vincent 写得很美丽，就像我会跟他说的：

如今我才明白，你想說的是什么
当你清醒时你有多么痛苦
你努力的想让它们得到解脫

但他们却不会理会，也不知该怎么做
也许，现在他们知道了

因为当初他们无法爱你
但你的爱依然真实
而当视线没有一丝希望
在那个繁星点点的晚上

你像许多恋人一样，结束了自己的生命
但愿我能告诉你，文生
这个世界根本配不上
一个像你那么美好的人