What is Intamacy?
How can we create it with a new partner or lover?
Creating physical Intamacy requires awareness, communication, and a comfortable environment..
Intamacy in the context here refers to establishing friendship, closeness, effection and bond..
When these steps below are applied with a potenial partner or your lover they will help establish a more balanced healthier relationship with more trust and love.
Steps that will help you establish Intamacy through shoulder massage:
So you brought your date or lover home and you are sitting together.. You want to get closer yet feel somewhat akward, Or maybe your are in normal automatic mode yet feel the need to have more care depth and connection in the moment..
First it will be very nice to light some candles and make sure the temperature is comfortable. Candles help bring our awareness into the moment and relax more.
When we are too cold or too warm we are constantly distracted, so be comfy..
Consent:
it is important to ask for premission before touching
someone or have someone touch you. With the right amount of kindness, respect and consideration you will be off on a good start to Intimacy.
It is best to have an understanding of what kind of touch is requested and for what purpose.. Am I asking to receive massage or give it? Am I looking to give some enjoyment or enjoy it myself? Is light touch or firm preferred ? Are their sore areas to avoid or focus on?
After an agreement is made gently place hands on shoulders and feel their body temperature with your palms.. As you breathe explore the emotions, energy and breath and notice any changes within yourself..
It important to smile and stay relaxed as you give the massage.. It is fine to let your thumbs do most of the work with "wax on" movements..
If u are working on the dry skin or if u feel to you can offer to put some massage oil or lotion..
The massage on the shoulders can be done intuitivly while staying within the boundaries agreed upon..you can put some relaxing music and keep massaging at a pace you are comfortable to keep.. Having an awareness of the self and other is crucial.. Through a few deep breaths you can reconnect emotionally with self and the other person and with a smile the hearts connect.. Once you are attentive to the other person's needs you are forming Intimacy.. Enjoy..
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