I do not fear failure,
It does not bother me to lose my efforts,
It does not concern me in the end to do little.
So what is measured by things !!
These are the fears of children and dreamers .. But I have used it !!
But what really terrifies me is the disappearance of desire !!
Do you know what it means to desire a man like me?
Do you imagine that I will wake up one day and find that worried fire in my chest has gone out?
Or that the glow of my eyes disappears?
Or to look at people and things coldly like a mummified bull?
I do not make myself a normal person .. I do not care so much that people see me as successful or failed .. Most of my world revolves around myself .. And my battles in my mind .. Although others were satisfied to lose their lives in exchange for a little iron, wood, cloth and yellow gold I did not I do it ..
If their plan is to work as slaves for forty years, in exchange for spending their old age mummified over the sofas, I did not create for this .. I never went to get what I need to get .. but what I like to get it ..
Yes, I have passed through sadness. But sorrow has never been a cave in which I observe ... but a bridge that I have crossed into something else. If you have seen me dashed and miserable at some point, it never meant that the sea inside me had calmed down. The wind that is recited in me has been silent. Sadness is not an antithesis of life, but a part of it.
Can we rejoice without having to cry?
Can we be happy to see a new baby without being able to grieve for an old death?
Or do we rejoice the spread of Shatha flowers and do not grieve the dryness of the river ?!
I have lived my entire life with the horse of desire. I am directed not by what I have but by what I do not have. And in all what I see .. And do not move me in all of this, but the sunniest human beings and things .. So if you see me someday as a fire extinguisher abandoned .. Or calm and satisfied as a wall clock .. Then you bury me ..
The lack of desire is death .. !!
