Ahh little you sounds like little pixie. She used to hide behind me every time an adult looked at her. Maybe little you really needed what she got which was being allowed to hide til she was good and ready to come out and say hi (which was usually about 10min before everyone was leaving XD).

Owch, being terminated like that is pretty bloody rough, no wonder it hit you hard.

Glad getting it off your chest was cathartic! Is it helping with the processing?