That reading the EULA thing is an argument I keep having with everyone because everyone insists "you don't have to read it" when I'm taking the better part of forever because I do read them, and are completely uninterested when I explain why you do have to read it XD

There seem to be a couple of movements (do you think I can find the one I was specifically looking for now? XD) with the intention of making EULAs easier to read and understand (and possibly also shorter as a part of that), but it's probably getting resisted by the people that write them, possibly for the tinfoil hat reasons you mentioned in the story XD