I wasn't going to get to heavy in my posts right away but I had wrote this on Facebook yesterday and I think it is a very important message that is not just for dance clubs. I went out on New Years Eve to a place that is well know to be a meat market type of club and I did have a good time and I expected much of what I saw, I just saw it differently this time around in the light of what is going on in our society. I will use the nickname, Victims, of the place instead of the actual name.
It has been a while since I have been to Victims, and I have to say, It was an education, especially in the light of all the allegations of sexual harassment and assault against so many celebrities and politicians. I think it all starts with accepting the inappropriate behavior I saw at Victors last night. There was so much inappropriate behavior by men, (but a couple women as well, though not nearly as bad), but I will give a couple hints. It is never appropriate to come up to a woman dancing and grind against her. And no matter how you approach a woman, if she moves away from you, or puts her elbows out to keep you at bay, it means she does not want to dance with you and is offended at the way you approached her.
Now women, I think we need to stop accepting this behavior and "try" to be nice about it. Don't be afraid to stick out your elbows if a guy does come up from you from behind, uncomfortably close. Don't be afraid to move away. And certainly don't be afraid to come off as a bitch and "hurt his feelings". He had no regard to your feelings by approaching you that way. And don't let drunk young friends out on the dance floor alone with "easy lay" written all over her (That was so sad, I hope she got home safe, and wish I followed her to make sure she was). Us women need to stick together and look out for each other until this "sexual predatory society".
So men, what is the right way to approach a woman on a noisy crowded dance floor? Simply get in front of her, so she can see you, holding out your hand in a way suggesting you would like to dance with her and if she accepts, then you dance. If she doesn't, then you move on. YOu can also approach her when she is off the dance floor and ask her to dance in a polite way. I know crazy old fashioned concept but it could work. If it doesn't move on. Maybe if women didn't have to have their guard up all the time, we would be more accepting of dancing with all kinds of men. Right now that is not the case, so RESPECT THAT. (And yes, you legitimately nice guys get the raw end of the stick on this, so sorry about that)
I know a lot of men and women are just out for the booty call these days, and hey, I am not your momma, so no judgement on that. Whatever you are after though, booty call, dance partner or possible long term relationship, BE RESPECTFUL.
Hats off to sadingly few, RESPECTFUL, men that were there last night.
Now everyone have a Happy New Year, and let us collectively have our 2018 word be RESPECT. I think it is much needed in our society is SOOOO many areas.
PS. Women, if a man does approach you in a respectful polite way, please be nice to him. You aren't obligated to accept his request, but at least let's try to encourage more appropriate behavior.
