Talking about dates, I never liked asking anyone out, and I never had a date during my school and college life. The only date I can count on was all planned by my eldest brother. It's a funny story and the only date experience I share with everyone.
I was in Sweden for the third time and asked my eldest brother to help me settle down. I was on a visit visa, so work was not permitted. The only way left for me to get a residential visa with a good job in Sweden was by getting married to a Swedish girl. My brother gave me a free hand and told me to do whatever I wanted, and he wouldn't interfere. I mention this because we come from a different family culture and values—a typical sub-continent culture. I'm sure everyone is familiar with it through Bollywood movies or having an Indian, Pakistani, or Bangladeshi friend. Even in Antarctica, you would find one!
He also advised me that the best way to find a girl in Sweden is by going on a cruise. Many people have done this and found someone nice who helped them settle down in Sweden. Honestly, I didn’t have the guts or interest in finding someone this way. I'm a one-woman man and always waiting for someone special, in other words, an arranged marriage.
When my brother realized that I wasn't capable of doing such things, he started looking for a Pakistani-Swedish girl for me. He thought it would be fine with me, but honestly, a mixed and confused girl carrying two different cultures wouldn't be able to handle me. Somehow, a friend of my brother managed to find one proposal and discussed it with him. Everything was done by my brother. The girl wanted to meet me alone, so he fixed a date for me. He selected a restaurant owned by his Bangladeshi friend, a very nice place in the middle of the city, and invited the lady through her mother. It was my brother and her mother who were eagerly trying hard to find a good match.
I arrived right on time for my first blind and strange date. It was strange because it wasn't proposed or managed by me. The lady came, and my interview started. I asked to order first and then start our discussion. Honestly, I was more focused on dinner than on the girl.
The questions started coming from her. She asked about my cooking skills, if I could do chores, and if I would be okay with her wearing swimsuits and other western outfits. I replied honestly. I told her that I am the youngest in my family and don't do chores. I'm not a very responsible person, but responsibility comes with time. I said that if we got married, we would work things out together, and it would be both our responsibility. However, I wouldn't be comfortable with her swimsuits and western outfits. I am a pure Pakistani boy and would live like one in Sweden if I got the chance. I wouldn’t just agree to everything to get the nationality.
I was too honest with my responses. I think she felt I wasn't the right person for her. She seemed confused by my honesty. We had a couple of jokes and funny talk (nothing inappropriate). We had dinner together, and she really liked it. I told her it was all managed by my brother, and even the bill was already paid. She found me humorous, but I think she was already into someone else and had come because of her mother.
After dinner, she took me to her home and introduced me to her siblings. Her mother really liked me and wanted me to marry her daughter. Her mother was a typical Pakistani mother, and that's why she liked me so much. Then she dropped me off at my home in her car. I shared this story with my family, and they all laughed. We knew nothing would come of it; it was just a date for fun. My brother tried so hard for me, but it wasn't my destiny.
When I was returning to Pakistan, the lady and her mother came to say goodbye and gave me a present, a perfume. The story ends here as she later called me in Pakistan and said that we wouldn’t get along because of our different mindsets. She admitted that I am a good, honest guy but wouldn't fit in their culture. We had a good chat in FB for a long time as a friend. This is my strange date story. I'm not sure if it’s good or bad, but because it’s the only one, I count it as a good one.
