This is a guide for women how to take a good care of her husband, to keep him, to take care of him ...
My grandfather died 2 years ago, and so far he was in (relatively) happy marriage with my grandmother. Of course, no marriage was perfect and certainly there was a days when both of them wanted to pack and leave that community. But they did not. Why?
We will not attribute it to my grandmother because she was a patient woman and she awaited him with a cooked lunch and dinner, ironing his shirt and suit every morning, raising their sons while he spent 80% of his life on the field working all over the world. We will not even attribute it to my grandfather who supported the whole family until my grandmother didn't had a one working day, when he was tolerant when she was depressed because she spent her whole life in the home caring for the family.
It's marriage, it's a community, and it takes two. For a successful marriage, two are needed, and two are needed to be divorced.
And my parents have been in (relatively) happy marriage for 37 years. Although in some situations I think how I would not suffer that if I was in her/his place, they just crossed over some things. Of course, my parents marriage was and is still much more modern than my grandparent's marriage, but the basics are there.
I do not know anyone in my environment whose grandparents are separated. Is that because the community was then much more conservative and did not tolerate it, than it was "suffer and be quiet" or because they didn't know for better then. Already with my peers there were a lot of parents who split up, not to mention the situation today. I know that the phrase is already worn out but there is really no tolerance anymore. And it has nothing to do with taking care your husband/wife or cooking and ironing, and etc (even though we could talk about it too).
A lot of women are gaining their career and do not want to enter into serious relationships, and when they enter the late 30's they marry for the first one who come. And of course, in those years you are much less flexible and tolerant than in the age of 20 and such marriage or relationship usually don't last long.
My mother had a successful career all her life, but she also raised three children and her husband (haha) and had a successful marriage.
There are those who come into marriage to save the relationship, decide to have a child and then after 5 years realize that they are not compatible. And you would not believe how many of these couples I know in the last couple of years. And how many do I know who are in such marriages and close their eyes before an obvious outcome.
And honestly, I do not care for those couples, I do not care about her or his feelings, but you are ruining a child's life because you are irresponsible people. No divorced parent's child is a properly constructed person, full of confidence.
Of course it is not the solution to be in a poor marriage and to suffer all kinds of things from another person, and under "all kinds of things" I mean insults, maltreatment and so on, and not things like: he didn't put down a toilet seat, gathered socks from the floor, she is jealous and etc..
Today people are suffering in itself, they do not communicate, do not argue, they rarely fall into good quality discussion and then one day they just separate from each other. There is nothing wrong with good discussion because after every rain the sun came up. You have to work, sit and discuss, try to change yourself and not just another person.
And finally, if these tips from the 1950's would apply there would be much better quality marriages, a lot more marriages would survive, and a lot of kids would be happier.
