Relationship Status: Married

Married? Yes. Happily married? But of course! So far.

Life is just like a fairy tale. You wake up one day, you meet the man of your dreams, you get along well with each other, you plan your future together, you get married, you build a family, you have a child - or two or more, you grow old together, you get buried side by side. And that's that. Quite a fantastic picture, ain't it?
Let me paint you another picture about marriage. The most beautiful part of it all. You walk down the aisle all dressed in white, everybody looking at you, your groom waiting at the altar.

I know anyone who has expressed their plans of getting married always received most unsolicited advice of them all - don't. Or at least think about it 10 hundred times. And there's good reason behind that. And it's not mainly because of the person you are marrying. Getting to know another individual usually do take a lifetime so there really should be no surprise if you discover something new about your spouse after you get married.

Family Kage Bunshin Times Two Times Two Times Two

When you get married, you don't just gain one additional individual in your life. When you marry, you don't just marry your spouse. You marry his past, his present, and his future. You marry his failures and successes. But most importantly, you also marry his family. Mine has a whole clan right beside him.

And that used to be stressful for me. First because my clan wasn't as closely tied as my husband's. I am used to a small family - my mother, my father, my three siblings. That's it. I get to see my aunts and uncles every now and then, I talk to my cousins but that's just about it. One might even say that in a family reunion, my role would usually be "The cousin who never shows up." My husband's clan on the other hand has at least five gatherings in one year. And that's when they are too
busy. It was fun and exciting. They are loving people. In fact, they are too loving.

It took me some time to adjust to the new family set up. I learned to adjust over the last five years we got married. I figured I should feel lucky because I know my husband grew around these loving people.

A Few Things to Note

_{He still looks at me that way everyday. Makes me feel like I am the most beautiful girl in the world.}

Here are a few tips I could share with you if ever you find yourself being smothered with too much love and attention.

1. You don't need to always tell them what is going on with your married life. Especially when a baby is on the way, they don't need to know how you plan on raising your own child. You are both adults, you should generally have a plan on your own.
2. If they give you any advice, you are not required to follow them. You may take it into consideration but at the end of the day, it is still up to you and your spouse.
3. Don't agree into living under one roof. That is a number 1 no-no in marriage 101. Married life is not a game, it is nearly impossible to co-exist with far too many new people in one house. Plus, there's a rule: A castle should only have 1 queen. So if you and your spouse can afford it, get (or rent) your own house.
4. Once you get married, your top priority is your spouse. Not your mom or dad, not your siblings or anybody else. Whenever there's a tough decision to make, you and your husband are a team.
5. Respect will bring your relationship a long way. Not just love. These two need to go hand in hand.
6. Don't lose yourself in the marriage. You and your spouse are a team, yes. But you are still you. You are allowed to grow, improve, and evolve.
7. There are no structurized set ups as wells as do's and don'ts in a marriage. I am talking about money matters. Some set up may be unconventional but as long as it works for you, then it works for you. Don't get worked up with how other couples do it. You and your spouse do your own thing.

I know me and my husband has just been married for five years, and has been together for 10 years all in all, but all those years have been full of adventures and learnings. I know we're still a long way towards future plans, but so far, I can say that we are both growing as individuals, as a couple, and as parents.

Not Yet a Happy Ending

Some say marriage is the hapoy conclusion of a beautiful love story. But the truth is it is only the start of the next chapter. Marriage is not always happily ever after, there are bittersweet realities, tons of hurdles and challenges. But as long as you face everything together, side by side and you got each other's backs, you should go a really long way together. At least that's the plan for the two of us.

This is the 4th day of @tegoshei's 30-day Blogging Challenge. I skipped days 2 and 3 but still I couldn't catch up. haha. You can still join in just follow the link.