fairy summoned, indeed. haha!

halfway through this, got the sense: 'yeah, this is coming from a Manifestor type alright.' hehe.

cross-reference with the other comment - i like that "there are limits... but it's an escape room..."

Yes, and the most annoying part is - those limits are only of your own making

though partly yes, the limits i'm referring to in these perspectives are the ones that are not of our own making - the laws of physics, the realities that the "grant us the serenity to accept what we cannot change" refer to, the things that are 100% outside of our control no matter what. yes, our beliefs construct alot of limits - though gravity is still taking anyone walking skyscraper, a cup full of arsenic is still killing anyone who drinks it, political conflicts in the middle east ain't gonna end tomorrow no matter how hard you & I meditate or "reprogram our subconscious," and as maleable as time may be, there still are the limits of 24 hours in a day and only so much we can accomplish in them, etc, etc...

and that's not to imply those limits are "negative..." (they only would be in the context of egoic immaturity that seeks to have reality conform to its childish ideals of how everything 'should' be according to its preferences, labeling fantasy as "positive" and anything/everything standing in its way as "negative" - versus the wisdom of embracing yin & yang and conscientiously working with Saturn's structures to align harmoniously with the universe rather than wanting to bulldoze "God's" design and force our own.)

like, "you can experience anything you want..." no. let's be real. the universe isn't just going to bend over and give us anything. that doesn't mean there isn't alot we/it could... so long as xyz...

(And surely, there’s some wisdom to The Rolling Stones’ classic, “you can’t always get what you want… but you just might find you get what you need.”)

i dunno how to fully convey all i mean without divulging into tens of thousands of words of specific detail, so hoping the overview is capturing it.

perhaps another key piece: the motivations, alignment (or not), and 'soul contracts.' like we could have "wants..." but where they're coming from, the frequency, intention, and implications are gonna make a huge difference in whether actually possible or not. like, the universe ain't gonna hand over every wish if it's not truly in alignment, no matter how much the mind/ego might think it wants it - versus a "want" that is more pure in intention, coming from heart, soul, spirit, serves others as well as self, and is in harmonious alignment... inbuilt 'protection mechanism' of sorts. perhaps that is a key distinction required in/with what I mean: the difference between the commercialized Law Of Attraction MLM mumbo jumbo that's sugar-coating and twisting legit universal laws in attempts to appeal to & appease ego desires versus genuine, heartfelt wants that are deeply part of one's 'soul purpose.'

And in tandem with that, perhaps there’s a hidden call in my ‘message:’ to be *realistic.’ Not in the sense most might interpret that at first (as in conforming to “normal” standards), but more so being realistic with oneself - brutally honest and discerning, not only in regards to what are the actual limitations one has to work within (time & energy being the most important/precious) but also as to what one truly does want at the most raw, deepest heart & soul level… which might actually differ drastically from the ego-mind’s first response upon promised by fake gurus selling fantasies appealing to base desires. Like maybe we can experience almost anything - should it be in true alignment at those deepest levels and we go about it in the proper ways - but not everything… and none of us have unlimited time to waste chasing crap that isn’t actually in alignment, so choose very fucking wisely!

Perhaps some of this has come from a “bitterness” (for lack of better word) & discontent with having exerted so much of myself in directions that ‘led nowhere’ & ‘amounted to nothing’ - and not in the sense of “failure,” but more like the hard crash down to reality to face how much truth there was to a statement once made with immense emphasis: ”you value the wrong things.” not that cynicism was leftover because “I didn’t get what I wanted,” but rather was late to realize the value of time & energy, having blown so much wanting the wrong things and head in the clouds of fantasizing over them, rather than keeping one foot on the ground, being more discerning and authentic with myself about what’s really nourish my heart & soul (not ego), and put the time & energy into that - having been more present, aligned, and empowered in those core truths. The “passion” on this topic, riled up as seeing & feeling how still so many charlatans & “coaches” fail to emphasize all those distinctions, and so many still buying into the shiny promises of ego gratification at expense of self-honesty and alignment with their deeper soul truths.

Granted, ”amplification & distortion…” t’is possible that some talking the “anything you want” narrative may be in agreement with this, though just not have worded it as such, and I’ve gone off on a tangent over semantics. (And/or defiantly/argumentatively playing a bit of devil’s advocate.)

then again / meanwhile, perhaps the “limits of our own making” might be seen in a different context/light - not in the sense of direct obstacles to what we think we want, but a perceptual framework that creates a problem different than thought, which may prevent from seeing what we really want and quicker, easier ways to access it…

for example, “I want $589 XRP and the abolition of income tax.” perhaps what I really want is the sense of freedom I think that would result in… and it’s not an actual set amount of wealth I need, but rather an adjustment of frequency into the vibration of wealth, freedom, and gratitude for what’s already in my experience harmonious with that - and some damn patience as the seasons & cycles take their natural course, rather than wanting harvest at the start of fucking summer. perhaps the bigger limitation isn’t what I’ve perceived to be the unjust coercive extortion system corrupt governments utilize to pay for shit I morally oppose, but my resistance to what is… and the greater freedom that I actually want might simply be accessed through acceptance of what is as it is now and growing da fuq up to conduct myself wisely, maturely & strategically to legally reduce my tax bills… which when crypto finally pops into the higher stratospheres, might end up a superior avenue given it’d entail recirculating much of that wealth back into service of others instead of not having those restraints and ending up in excess self-indulgent materialism - something that might not actually be aligned with the sense of “freedom” I actually want at a deeper level. (or maybe still rationalizing here, trying to gaslight myself into acceptance when I’ll never resonate with the systems as they are. though, there has been an ever-so-slight increase in peace since making this shift into acceptance, after having spent years in resistance. and call it a “negative belief” if you will, though I still have a hard time entertaining the idea that any zero-point meditation will actually “shift timelines” to one without income tax if we’re not already on one where that may likely.)

or the crippled midget… why da fuq would he even delude himself into thinking he wanted to be an NBA all-star. not to be “negative,” but c’mon. and chances are he’s got some sorta talent that he could run with smoothly, some genius that it’d be a disservice to abandon by egoic fixation on something he’s simply not designed for. perhaps whatever he thinks being a NBA allstar would bring might actually be achievable in a much different way that’d end up making him alot happier - not “struggling against all odds” to “prove himself” in an uphill battle, but reorienting to “the path of least resistance” and finding far greater satisfaction on/in/with it.

suppose those last couple points may be exactly what you mean by “But "what you want" should really be paraphrased to 'how you want to feel' because achievements and possessions might give a glimpse of permission to feel the way you want to feel, but it's not a secure way to go about it.”

or the peace in the middle east… I dunno. “soul contracts.” “blueprint.” a whole lotta “things we can’t understand” and “things we can’t change.” As much as we may be able to “manifest” certain things in our personal lives, world’s been full of people in horribly shitty situations they didn’t want… maybe it is all chaos, or maybe there is some ‘higher divine order’ in it all that we each signed up for prior to incarnation and are getting what we wanted/needed at a soul level. (The degree to which that is true vs. just another commonly regurgitated belief… 🤷‍♂️

one other thing, along with the “pretend to not know what I want than to admit to it and feel all the dread and fears of failing to achieve it/get there” / “rationalizing staying “stuck” in cynicism rather than accepting/embracing/clarifying what I actually want…”

perhaps part of the deconditioning process… coming to acceptance that in some ways I may already be living what I want - and ceasing judgement of it. like all those youthful ambitions were engrained so deep, that mind/ego feels like the simplicity of where I’m at and what may enjoy “isn’t enough.” that it’s been so fixated on grandiosity for so long and the habits of putting myself/itself on a pedestal and judging everything beneath, that part of my psyche is kinda having a temper tantrum over how basic “real life” is in comparison - having lost its fuel of larger-than-life fantasies. cuz in some ways, I’m content here & now (so long as not switching into mind/ego and letting them run wild). i mean, if i really wanted to go off traveling somewhere, i could… though even with an opportunity coming up to get back into the primo building at bottom of resort in Revy come April, I like where I’m at… even though oddly stubbornly resistance to admitting it. if I really wanted to be making music all the time, I could… but am not; and am kinda enjoying taking a break from it… at least until mind/ego takes over and goes all in on judging that. i’ve been in extreme hermit mode cuz truthfully, i want to be… even if there are aspects of self, be it ambitious ego wanting to prove itself as “better” somehow or conditioned mind, that are at odds with that authentic acknowledgement.

whereas I once wanted huge musical success… it’s not even a matter of fears of failure, but that i really don’t even want it anymore - and it’s a weird adjustment period, given how big a part of my self-image/identity it used to be. perhaps one aspect of “fear of failure” may be that measurement against those old highest ideals, the judgement that I’ve “fallen short of potential,” etc… yet truthfully, I probably just want that basic Peace & Satisfaction more than any of the old “success” measurements used before. and it’s kind of a big adjustment. like I stretched myself so far - aimed so high, pushed past limits & reaped consequences - that ‘bouncing back’ is taking a while. like years for the impulsive energy towards hopping around overseas aimlessly again to settle, years for the emotional waves to complete and get to clarity. and from that, even being able to reconnect to what core wants I had prior to getting taken over by compulsive ambition for worldly expansion - such as simply living in the mountains and snowboarding cuz it nourishes my body & soul way more than all the grandiosity...

(That all said, to some degree, it’s probably partly still a rationalization to avoid facing truths of where I do/may still want more yet hold back… the yin-yang duality sure is inescapable, lol. Or perhaps that’s just the nature of emotional waves, fluxing through the ebbs & flows of opposites.)

blah, blah, blah.

totally didn’t expect to digress in so many different directions, haha. Hopefully it all made sense and was relevant, not just spiraling out into an unsolicited therapeutic rant. gotta stop myself here or might never, lol 😬