Belief is hard. We know logically that to truly believe in something creates neural pathways - positive or negative - but it's all about constant repetition and really, really working hard at it - which is actually really fucking tough!
I always wonder if you get homesick for Australia. I used to, a lot. Then I moved back and was homesick for Europe - ha. Now I can't imagine living anywhere else. Especially in the beautiful place i live (check out my post where I see it from the air in a friends plane - I know you don't visit my blog often but you might like it).
RE: If there were Magic