Who is going to buy Spankchain?

Seriously, who the fuck is going to buy SpankChain?

Don't get me wrong, I think it's a great idea. Adult entertainment on the blockchain. Every man without a bible up his ass enjoys porn. I don't have to convince you internet porn is a big deal. I jerked off already just before writing this. It wasn't to the latest magazine of Hustler, and I certainly didn't go to some sex store to buy a DVD while feeling like a deviant. I jumped online, found some hot web cam girls waving their snatch around, and I blew my wad.

The problems SpankChain seeks to resolve is the discrimination adult performers receive from these piece of shit centralized banking industries who somehow seem to think it is alright to refuse processing payments given to a smoking hot young girl who is "paying her way through college". More recently, Bitpay has jumped on this bandwagon in an attempt to legitimize BTC and has stopped paying these sultry dick stiffeners as well.

In comes Spankchain with it's porn spokeswoman, Kayden Kross.

I completely support the concept. I like porn. For porn to keep happening, these girls (or guys, clowns, whatever the fuck floats your nutsack) need to keep getting paid. But as great of an idea I believe it is, I don't believe Spankchain is the answer.

First, let's imagine your dad. He probably doesn't know about crypto-anything. My old man would be lucky to get his visa card on a website to pay these girls. He doesn't know how to get bitcoin, and he sure as fuck doesn't know how to get ethereum or spankchain. I also bet that if you go to any porn chat room, most guys are going to be like my dad. If you really want to know, go to chaturbate.com and quiz the guys jerking off about the wide world of crypto. I'm going to take a nutshot in the dark and guess that you, the person reading about Spankchain right now, knows way more than any other guy in there.

Spankchain is further complicating this process by having a Spankbank, tipping with a currency called Booty, etc. The shit hurts my head just trying to sort it out. The one saving grace that Spankchain may have is that it is building its own platform for cam girls to use and accept booty on. If Spankchain can do this and create a method that makes it easy for horny fuckers to buy/sell booty or spank, then they may be on to something.

Right now the world of crypto is in its infancy, and perhaps one day when it is readily accessible to even the most pathetic window lickers this idea might take off. Spankchain may be staking their claim early and waiting for that day to come. If so, this may be an investment that pays off a real long ways down the road. If you have that much faith in the project, buy some.

More importantly, if you just want to own a token named Spankchain and support the masturbation industry, go on ahead. That along with the lawls almost had me opening my wallet. Otherwise... I'd avoid it like the plague for the forseeable future.

Keep on jerking.