Someday, if you ever have a son,
The first time you look at him, you get a feeling all at once; that you'd die for him.
Little thing you never saw before, and you would stone-cold die for him.
That feeling doesn't go away.
You might forget;
But it is always there.
Always there.
Excerpt from Finestkind
Our existence is the gift of our parents, of course through Him, if you believe it. Like it or not, we wouldn’t have that option of liking if we didn’t exist, never born and raised in this cruel world. And our parents— they make sure we are well taken care of; within their boundary of choice. Choice, I emphasise.
It was a short weekend for me, given the long night and less sunshine. Again, not getting my day off on Sunday, so, I was supposed to relax today. I did, indeed. Two movies in a row without even bothering about the lovely sunshine out there. Oh, how I like my bed and the warmth of the heater— a duo I miss most on weekdays.
Anyway, the lines quoted above made me think twice about parenthood. Well, parenthood is a complicated thing, vast in a sense and can always be questioned based on perspectives, but being a father— it just happens. Sometimes even if you don’t wish to be. If he/she is to be born, there’s no stopping, I know that very well.
And you are eternally bonded to the soul you just brought into this world. This way or another, but, surely there’s no escaping. Somehow, somewhere at any stage of your life, your heart will ache to know that your child is in danger. Even if you don’t care, there will be a thin layer of melancholy affecting your mind, reminding you about your connection to that poor soul. It just happens.
So, I was watching the movie with a neutral attitude, not knowing if I would like it or not. I was kind of disappointed with the opening and all until those lines struck me like a thunderbolt. As if I could feel the depth of those words to my bone. As if it is questioning me, questioning thousands of parents out there if they feel the same.
I wonder what my father thinks about that, would he die for me, am I ready to die for my offspring? How far will you go for your family, your beloved? I really don’t have the answer but I will try to figure out something so I don’t have to think about dying for my children— perhaps it’s cool to say that but deep down I know the feeling will always be there, always.