Why do I do what I do?
Why do I continue to try and push myself so I am always working. At one point I owned or was a managing partner in 5 different companies at once.
I still am in 3. Some days it is too much.
Weekends and evenings just mean that I am working from a computer at my home instead of my office.
Ego?....I have a healthy view of myself.
Money?....always a necessity but it is not the be all end all.
I convince myself it is for the sake of creating itself. I do love to see something I started benefit everyone involved.
Having a bad week has me reflecting a bit deeper than usual. 2 missed contracts and other progress crawling for the last month has dragged me down.
I believe that I am motivated a lot by the fear of loss. Not proud of that. I see an opportunity and imagine not taking advantage of it. If I was content with what I already had I could have a very comfortable and slow paced life. I just can't do it.
I have to learn to live the old cliché... Love what you have, not fear what you might not get.
Maybe someday. Until then my rollercoaster continues.
This was tough to write. Thanks.
