In my few years of being alive on earth, I've been lucky enough not to have experienced a lot of heartbreaking moments, moments so sad that they just disorient the whole of your body for a while, although now and then, it happens.
But just because I don't get to experience it a lot, whenever it does happen to me, I find my body doing things I never even knew it could do. Yesterday was one of those sad days for me. Something I've been working on for years crumbled yesterday, and it ruined my week, and this is just the second day of the week.
When I woke up this morning, I was feeling way worse than I felt yesterday, and all I wanted to do was just forget everything. If I were a guy who was into drugs, I probably would have blacked out by now; that is how much I so want to forget.
But you see, inasmuch as I know that I'm going through it right now, I also know that the last thing I want is for my body to break down, so even when I don't feel like it, I still do the things that I need to do. I still show up for work and carry out my duties like I should. I still make sure to brush my teeth in the morning to take care of the dishes and my living environment.
Not only that, but I even went to get my hair cut, and my barber could notice that although I was there physically, the distant look in my eyes told him that my mind wasn't.
By the time it got to 6pm later tonight, I had to force myself to try to eat something because I wasn't feeling hungry. But after I was done eating, the strangest thing happened because I tried standing and fell right back. It was almost as if I hadn't eaten for a week and had no strength to do anything.
It was shocking to me because I had just finished eating. But I guess it just goes to show how much power the mind has over the body, because it still made me feel weak even though I had taken the necessary things (food) that were supposed to give me strength.
It's currently 8pm, and I'm just going to post and go to bed now. Usually, I would hope to feel better tomorrow, but I doubt it. I will be fine anyway.