It's not because of the lovey dovey sticky gooeyness. That's fine.
It's not because of the obnoxious commercialization. I don't have to partake.
It's not even because of how monogamous it is. I don't expect society to be polyamorous just yet.
I hate it because everything that happens on this day is disingenuous. Literally any other day would have more meaning.
You get me something special, or send me a card, or tell me how much you love me. I know it is because a day showed up on the calendar, and not because of feelings you just had to express.
It isn't all bad, of course. Long relationships can get in a bit of a rut, and it's a nice reminder that you should do something for your loved ones, do something special. But really, just do it any other day, please. Just pick a random day and get me balloons. Balloons make me happy, balloons for not reason, just because you woke up that day and loved me, makes me even happier.
Gifts are fun. Get me a gift I like, and it's heart warming. But really, give me that gift any other day. Randomly come across something you think I'd really love, and get it for me. Because it made you think of me. Don't buy me a gift because a date showed up on the calendar, and you went out looking for something. Agonized over it. And then got me something just because it's that day of the year, without being completely sure I'd like it. But hey, at least you found something.
I also hate the other side
I hate feeling pressured into doing something special on this day. Maybe today I don't feel like it. Maybe today is just not that special for me. Maybe I don't have a good idea. Maybe I don't love you with overflowing intensity today because I broke my rib last week and honestly, I'm depressed.
Luckily, my SOs don't make me feel pressured.
I mean, I used to really hate birthdays. I warmed up a bit to the idea of "I survived another year" concept. I guess it became a little less trivial as I aged. I also felt at one point the desire to celebrate my existence. I did that only once though, and have no need to repeat it.
But more than that, I hate the culture around birthdays. The gift giving, which just like valentine's is more meaningful any other day of the year. Not only that, you're set up for this back and forth evaluation thing. Hate it.
Hate is a strong word. I don't really hate it. I don't sit around all day festering my hatred for gift giving, it just makes me sigh every time it comes around.
I like celebrating a relationship that has lasted another year. It's nice to have a reminder that "look, we've made it work." Relationships take energy, they're accomplishments, celebrating accomplishments are nice.
