I often regret about not having a pet but there is a good part of everything.This cat passed away after 19 years,I know it must be hard.Such a long time you had this cat.I went really emotional when I was reading about the part that you held him and started crying historically as the vet was administrating the drug.The cat was purring,he sure knew how much you loved him.Some people may not but I strongly believe that animals have feelings,they can understand our love and affection.