In my reading of the unconventional RPG Callisto, with a view to use it as inspiration for a new Nth Society RPG, I noticed this important insight:
Characters need a list of close family members. [...] This might or might not tie into goals, but it’s important because it gives players something to talk about and motivate them as they craft their letters. Almost all humans have relationships and act based on them to some extent, so give the characters some people to care about.
It is for the same reason that in the original proposal for Nth Society we set forth a system where new users would be born with guardians, who would then be responsible for them for a short period of gameplay. This is quite at odds of dropping new users, adult formed already, into new worlds, often naked, ill equipped and with no sense of how they got there. It's like the starting version of the typical cheaters end to an essay to justify fantastic stuff: "... and then I woke up". We see this commonly in Rust, DayZ, Minecraft, even Second Life.
However things are a little different in a roleplaying game, or so I have gather. The slightly better default focus on relationships is more suitable the aims of a game which explores how people help and hinder each other in the world at large. What I'll put forward here are a basic list of relationships which some average person can reasonably have interactions with, especially someone who is perhaps trying to build a homestead, start a business, or otherwise try find a way to live more so by voluntaryist means.
People who are born around you, grow up around you and you around them. Who have a mutual responsibility with you, but can also break this bond, though not without consequence to other family members. Can bring new family members in by romantic relationships (up to and including marriage) or simply by having children with them. People who interfere with your life, who might argue with you for inheritance (or even more mundane, as children for toys or even relative freedom). Those who you first learn about life with, who you play and fight with, who set the tone for your life, but with any luck do not define it. People who take care of you, and you get sick around you and die. People whom of course, for the vast majority of members, for the vast majority of people in the, who you love.
The family you choose. People who almost always at some time or another were physically close to you, and just in you general area. It could have been at school, at a sports club, congregations of your particular religion (or your parents), in your neighborhood, or later at work, bars, clubs, festivals, the shooting range, and so on. More commonly today, it might have been over online gaming communities or even social networks (the better ones) like Steem. People who gain more or less relevance by your continued and reaffirmed connection. This can deteriorate, and even sour into animosity, perhaps over a love rival, a change in political attitude, the discovery of a cardinal sin committed or flaw deep enough to divide you, or a troubling mental illness or physical ailment. Can become the strongest bonds of your life, one that you'd die for.
People in your locality, especially within direct proximity. Often a fraught relationship, as they say "familiarity breeds contempt", and you do not necessarily have the close bonds of love, friendship and loyalty that you do with friends and family. In polite communities the pleasantries can mask a deep dislike or even hatred as the slights pile up over improper garbage disposal, loud music, not inviting to events, accidents when cutting trees, extensions to buildings on properties, closing off common byways, or a bad case of "what's he doing in there?". However friendships can bloom over shared interests, the common lot of the ups and downs of weather, politics and market prices, and kindnesses extended over summer evenings and winter mornings.
Those who you work with by happenstance, or by choice. The veneer of professionalism can be thin but it's often enough to hold if people keep their tempers in check. Given enough time that will always be tested. Still, the common goals are almost always enough to keep things moving along. There will be much greater ups and downs here, in proportion to the closeness of the relationship and the stake each has on the work of the other.
Those people whom you command in a professional sense, or who command you. The relationship is one of power, even though there are many customs in all cultures to distract the consciousness of this fact. The power derives from the consequences of following directions, judgement based on performance and of course in the worst case on totally arbitrary decisions, feelings and prejudices. This is hierarchy, pure and simple, as inspired by military chain of command.
This can strangely be one of the most distant and independent relationships on the one hand, and the most important on the other. Impersonal trading between people, not needing to know or care who sells you bread or who you sell it to, is one of the hallmarks of the modern market. Trust is always needed for commercial dealings, even if it is just bread, but the incentives of the market keep this right - or at least it's supposed to. Cultural customs of fairness, emerging standards, reputations for inspection, legal requirements, and so on. Businesses are made and disintegrate on word of mouth, demand and supply, as well as by law and decree.
People who are chiefly related to you by your interest competing with theirs. It could be in business, a social rival, or family feud. There is always something at stake, be it money, power or honor. These relationships are highly volatile but can go on for years. They often collect winners and losers, but by the narratives told it's not always clear who is who.
People and institutions to whom you owe money, and from whom you are owed. This relationship is also one of power, but it's more subtle and complicated that a chain of command. In most cultures paying your debts is a sign of virtue and those who shirk are among the most untrustworthy of society. Yet ironically all people understand the unjustness of crushing debt, and those who lend have historically be ostracised from "good" society. Debt has always been a way to control (think of indentured slaves, post-slavery cotton pickers, and the mafia). Today faceless, brightly branded institutions handle this low business, one on which all of modern society is built. Still, since recorded time most "cultured" people can expect to spend their lives in debt to one degree or another. Those collecting debts almost always use force, or the threat of it. Debt among friends and family is an almost sure path to discord, but small mutual favors and gifts, while often having the feeling of a debt, incur those to pass thing back and forth to each other, but we would not call this a creditor / debtor relationship per se.
People in your religion, that strongly support the same sports team, in the same profession, perhaps in the same social class or other identity group, or even age bracket, or who share a very absorbing hobby or way of life. When you meet these people, either during a group event, community meeting or just by chance, you have a lot of common ground with them, maybe even quite a few pillars of the same philosophy. That doesn't mean your likely to really get along, personalities can differ and in every group there can be vying for leadership and prestige, but you will speak the same language, so to speak, on many matters. You may even be able to avail of spontaneous help or patronage.
Closely bound to each other by secret rituals, codes of conduct, arcane knowledge, or even common designs on political and cultural influence. Not much is known to outsiders of these groups beyond their often strict hierarchy and that they are bound to each other. This can often result in far more mundane things in reality, such as a weird kind of friendship, sense of purpose and always tending help to fellow members. It might however include strange pleasures and tortures, or be the forum to organize social movements or political coups.
People whom from your perspective are there to do you harm. They take your property, harm you and your loved ones, cause you ruin. They may try to take things from your home, or might remotely reduce your bank balance. It could be part of physical conflict involving fists, or bombs dropped on your house. They will always use force of one form or another to take, money, possessions, life or liberty.
On the local, federal, national and international levels, the body of people who run the apparatus of what is called the modern state and it's interests. They may appear to coincide with your interests, they may not, and that reading can change. Officers of the law, the judiciary, that write legislation, make impassioned speeches on behalf of others, give military orders, and indeed orders of many kinds, create mountains of paperwork, regulate the lives of all folk in their regions, spy, record. True that many of these things private citizens and companies do too, but not on such as scale or with such impunity. While speaking the language of compromise they are often uncompromising, their agents more efficient by the year at navigating around your protestations, be it on the street, in the ballot box, by way of direct action or simply living as you wish to. The irony is that it is only made of people but it appears then to take on a life of it's own. Government and it's agents are essentially interference in ordinary people's lives, but this interference can be desired, in the form of protection, healthcare, handouts, securing resources, jobs etc. Is it responsible for these things, that is debatable, but it certainly claims to.
Can you think of another important relationship definition I'm missing here?
Photo used is Greek community picnic at Ferny Grove, ca. 1937 by an unknown photographer, recorded by the State Library of Queensland: link
