The start of something that almost never ends. Rumours.
I personally don't like this as it often causes a lot of issues regardless of it being true or not. "Baseless rumours", they say. But, are they really baseless?
Imagine waking up one particular morning, and as you take your usual hike, you notice that all the people youve greeted didn't respond. If you're someone like me, you Prolly wouldn't read much meaning to it. But, then, you see people staring at you at the slightest chance they get and then you realise that something might be wrong.
You start fidgeting, thinking about all the possible things that could be wrong and it'd be perfectly normal if your mind crosses all the bad things you've done in the past. But, you think deeply and realise that's not the problem.
Perhaps, you have one very close friend in the neighbourhood, whom despite what he's heard, decided to act like a "normal" person by asking you to hear the rumoured story from your own perspective.
But, the problem now is, you don't even know what the rumoured story is.
He confronts you about it and you deny it because, of course, you have no idea as to why or how they started accusing you of something you definitely didn't do. This could cause serious worry to you and you'll be in an unstable state as you'll want to prove the rumours wrong.
What advice would i give?
I'd prolly tell you to ignore it. I know, i know, it's a lot harder than that but you'll figure it out. You'll eventually get tired of the accusations and rumours and those who truly and really observe your conduct and character will spot a noticeable cadence which will help them figure out for themselves lf the rumours are true or not.
But that's just if the rumours are false. What if they're true?!
Now, this is where the real dilemma sets in.
You can't deny it, and some people would even dare to confront you about the rumour and your silence would be an answer to them, the answer they crave, that the rumour isn't baseless, after all.
You'll try to hide your presence in public as much as possible, try to limit your interactions with those you still manage to associate with and the endless cycle just continues.
To make things worse, maybe you did something really terrible and people give you death stares to show their irritation for your sordidity as a person.
Oof, that's tough luck, I can imagine and I'm sure some if not most of us can relate to either of these two situations. In this particular situation, though, what's the first step to take?
I'd say it's forgiving yourself for whatever you've done.
This is imperative to any other thing that'll follow.
Forgiving yourself and realising your flaws would help you regain your self-esteem and eventually start showing your face in public again. Over time, you'll eventually start shunning the haters who just don't wanna let things go.
Eventually, you'll gain your confidence and might even confront those who want to permanently dent your reputation and over time, these rumours will fade. It's important to remember that.
Sometimes, I wonder though if the rumours ever completely go away. You know, even though everything is done and said, sometimes, we still reminisce the past and others remember us based on what happened back then or even based on the rumour they heard about us back then. They may leave a mark, a lasting one, sometimes. What could help?!
Well, now, you know you're not the problem.
You've removed every trace of such rumour over time but you can't totally remove the image others have of you in their mind, you just need to live with it and try to make a new impression on them, a new image of you in their minds, one that would eradicate how they formerly looked at you.
Even if nothing changes, what should matter is that you've regained your self esteem and you no longer see yourself as who you used to be but now as who you've become.
And i put it to you,
You will find your light again.
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