trust in yourself

This is the crux of everything. We have been taught that we are inherently bad, that something is surely wrong with us. We look for our faults, and of course find some. In fact, if we were taught to simply operate according to what we genuinely feel, taught that we are intrinsically good and wise, we would be much more loving and positive beings.

I don't think there is anything terribly wrong with justifying actions though. A little extra thought wouldn't hurt, as long as we stay true to ourselves, and are not justifying to make our actions palatable to someone else. Things get terribly complicated then as you say, manifolds deep. You do you, let others do themselves. There's far too much emphasis on trying to find the one, absolute, proper way to be now. In fact, there is no one proper way to be, think, or act.