I've seen about three reviews here in this community, on this book and how amazing it is. But you see, everything I have to say about this book is no different from all they've said. So, this is going to be more like a rant. A rant fuelled by the emotions that overtook me, during and after the process of reading.
I used to see so many misleading posts about feminism and what it stands for, online and knowing that whatever they seemed to portray, did not go down well with me, I unassociated myself with that name. I remember one time in my secondary school group chat, someone randomly posted a picture listing the achievements of one of our female seniors, and someone commented, 'All these things are rubbish. After all, she will still end up in the kitchen'. Boy, was I flabbergasted by that statement. I'm not one to talk on the group chat so, I entered the dm of one of my trusted persons, and while we discussed the situation, we both reached the 'I'm not a feminist but -' level. We talked for long, rejecting the feminist title but still going along with what it stood for. The irony.
Although I had researched what feminism as a lifestyle meant, before I read this book, I devoured the contents like a starved human. This book gave an indepth description of what feminism at it's truest is like. I read this book after reading a series of unsatisfying books and I soon began to give thanks to whatever force that influenced the unsatisfying books I'd been reading. Because it was actually out of frustration I picked up this book since I'd heard so many positive things about it.
I have met quite a number of sexist people, I'm tired. These people make no effort to even hide the crassness of their mentality. And I know misogyny is something that's existed for years, hence the reason why it can't be eliminated almost immediately. But how many more years are needed to wipe out this sexist mentality, some humans are plagued by? I remember the first day at my workplace. I was just getting the hang of things and my superior, coming out to see what I'd done so far, saw it and complimented 'I like what you did. You're smart'. A customer, from where he was, casually threw in the statement 'You're smart. I hope when you're finally kept in the house, you'll still be smart'. The smile was immediately wiped off my face.
How does my intellect, when applied at work, automatically relate to me being wifed? Why is it that these men with fragile egos, casually assume they're worthy of keeping a woman, just because they're men? How do you even keep a woman? Like you do the tables and chairs in your house? Make it make sense.
Another topic this book talked about, and I loved reading, was the topic of being liked as a woman. It reminded me of this guy I was just getting acquainted with. A very nice one. He held out his hand for a handshake and being goofy, I didn't just shake him. I added some theatrics I'm used to performing around my male friends and this guy went ahead to say 'Why are you greeting me like that? Don't you know boys don't like it?'. That literally ended things between us. Because what made him think I cared about what boys liked me doing? I enjoy shaking people, using theatrics. So, I shouldn't do that, because the insecure men around me would feel threatened, and decide not to like me? It's not worth it actually. If a man liking me, determined my level of happiness, I might have followed this strictly. but sadly, it doesn't.
There are so many tutorials, teaching ladies do's and dont's. Why aren't there so much videos teaching men what is acceptable, how they should dress to appear attractive to the other gender and what not? What is it with dictating how people, women precisely live their lives, according to your own idea of the right thing?
If you have no idea what feminism means, this book is a great way to be enlightened. Chimamanda, through her experiences, and insight, has compiled a short and enlightening write-up for everyone. And so, I want to use this opportunity to clear this. If I ever told you I am not a feminist, or I don't support anything feminism, it no longer stands. I AM A FEMINIST. I am a woman supporter. I now have an indepth knowledge of what being one means, and so, I have accepted the term fully. It's a choice for you too.
Images are screenshots from my e-library.
Thanks for reading
