Source
In our society today, we here people complaining of the moral decadence, indecipline behavior and lots more. We often hear people saying things like " how did we get here ?" But we forget that some of the things we are complaining about today, might have been something that we had the opportunity to correct or speak against when it started, but we overlook it, thinking it's not that serious or it's just a normal thing or maybe we benefited from it at that time so we never saw the need of speaking up against it or condeming it.
A child that you see dressing half naked on the street today and you are complaining, started that dressing somewhere and maybe the people who saw it when it started never see the need of calling him or her to order and the act gradually looks normal. A child that you see today being so disrespectful did not just start the day you see him/her, it started somewhere and maybe when it started we didn't see it as anything , we just overlook it and call it normal thing.
Most of the culture/tradition that you see us complaining about today , are the culture that started as a little mistake or just a normal thing and nobody said anything about it , maybe because they were benefitting from it and all of a sudden it became normal and we start complaining.
Now fast forward to the recent news of Mr. Tony Elumelu and the young lady who address him as "Tony". Reading through comment, you can see that about 80 percent of people are against the girl's manners and who trained her. If you trace back, you might see that maybe the lady has tried a similar stuff with somewhere with someone else or maybe she has seen it being done somewhere and it was seen as normal , so she tries to bring it and implement it with Mr. Elumelu and she was openly corrected.
Also you will see some people trying to defend the lady, saying that it's nothing , that in western countries that's how it's being done.
The truth is, this is Africa ( you might choose to call me a local or an African man, no problem ), but truth be told we have our own culture of doing things here and it shape our behavior, the way we greet, eat , dress etc. Now trying to copy in what you have been seeing somewhere else makes it appear odd and the dwellers of the community might see it as wrong. Africa and respect for is like 5 and 6. Take for example a typical Yoruba man will always prostrate or bend to greet an elderly person , but to those in the "western countries" that might not mean anything for them.
So you standing up to address an African man in Africa who is not even in your age range with just his name might sound odd or disrespectful to the man and other listeners ( you might call it African mentality if that's what you will choose to ). Which is why the man clearly stated that you address him properly, that he does not subscribe to kind of "Oyibo" pattern of greeting. Meaning , he acknowledge that it might be okay to greet that way in some other places or to someone else, but he doesn't subscribe to that. That is to say when you are in Rome behave like the Romans.
But the problem in this part of the world is that we try attaching emotions to nearly everything, or we try defending what we might not be able to defend later, which is why I like telling people, don't start the race that you are not sure that you will be able to run to the end.
I know there are organizations that permits individuals/colleagues calling you by your name, but most of these organization still stress that you add Mr. Mrs. or Ms. to the names. So if Mr. Elumelu has corrected the young lady and you are still trying to defend all I can say is hmmm.
Just wait till the day you are sitting with your father of about 60 years and a young individual of about 20 to 30 years walks up to him and call him by his name and tries to enquire for something then you will know how the African in you will feel.
