You see ehn, rain no just fall these days, it attacks! I don’t know if the clouds had too much to drink or if God mistakenly pressed the “shower” button instead of “sprinkle”, but whatever the case, this recent rainfall has been moving mad!
So, picture this: it was early this morning, and I had an important meeting at work. I woke up to the soothing sound of rainfall only that it wasn’t soothing at all. It was the kind that made you start praying without opening your eyes: “Dear Lord, please let them cancel work today.”
I opened my window and boom! The entire street had turned into River Niger. Not even a canoe in sight. Just pure unprovoked flood. But I was determined. I had plans. I had responsibilities. I had suya money to make!
I grabbed my two footwear combo like a pro rubber slippers for “marine mission” and my fine office shoes for “dry land”. My trousers were rolled up like I was about to go fetch firewood in the village. Armed with an umbrella that had trust issues (because it kept flipping in the wind like it wanted to elope), I stepped out.
Just three minutes into the journey, I started rethinking my life. Water entered my slippers and started baptizing me one toe at a time. I tried to act calm, like a civilised Lagosian, until one okada passed me at top speed and sent a tsunami straight into my soul.
Now soaked from chest to socks, I pressed on. But the real comedy started when I reached the entrance of the office. As I reached into my bag to change shoes, one of my rubber slippers decided to retire, it snapped in half like it was protesting unfair working conditions.
There I was, one foot bare, the other soaked, trying to hop to safety like a distressed penguin. Then the security guy at the gate gave me that “oga, are you okay?” look. I smiled through my shame and said, “I dey do half-day swimming, half day working.”
When I finally got inside and changed into my dry shoes, I walked into the office like nothing happened. But deep down, I knew I had just survived a seasonal natural disaster
Moral of the story? During rainy season, don’t just carry an umbrella, carry hope, courage, and a spare leg, just in case one gets waterlogged.
And please, if anyone sees my left slipper floating around Agege, kindly return it. There's still a pending appointment with destiny next week.
Images are AI generated
