There are many ways to kill a rat without seeing blood. ~ Anonymous
“No, no, no, this can’t be happening,” Sydney muttered repeatedly as she paced. She was not going to take this seriously. She was not.
She knew she should have come home straight from classes and not try to get over her new hatred for the love park. She should have come straight home.
“What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?” she asked herself, still pacing.
She was so engrossed in her mantra that she didn’t notice Karen looking at her.
Karen was her roommate and has been for three years. They were not really close, but they tolerated each other well. In fact, the reason they were not close is because Karen and Rita didn’t get along, and none of them was ready to try.
Each of them hated the other on sight. Karen hadn’t liked Edmund too, and that seemed to have annoyed Rita more than it did Sydney. That should have been a sign. Karen seemed to understand Sydney in a way many people never got to, as she was quite observant. She had shown herself a friend when Sydney was yet overwhelmed in grief, calling each day without fail until Sydney came back to school.
They were not close yet, but that period had shown Sydney that Karen was a great person. The betrayal from Rita and Edmund had also given her an insight into Karen. If there was anyone who could have guessed that there was something between Rita and Edmund, it was Karen. She never smiled when either of them where in the house, but she looked positively angry whenever they were both in the house, and many times she was the reason they left early. She never said a word to them, but her countenance made them uncomfortable.
Looking back, Sydney suspected that Karen knew something about Edmund and Rita. Despite their differences, which included their skin and hair colour, they were good roommates to each other and that had made them remain so for three years.
“Should I be worried? You look petrified.” Karen said, halting Sydney’s pacing and weakening her resolve to hold the tears back.
“I’m fine,” Sydney said, breathing deeply to stop the flowing tears. Failing, she crumbled to the floor, “I'm... I'm fine,”
Karen was by her side in an instant, taking her in her arms. “No you are not. You are not, Sydney,” she said in a soothing voice.
Karen wondered if Sydney was still hung up on that two-timing idiot called Edmund. She hoped not; he was not worth it. As Karen held the crying Sydney, she blamed herself for the umpteenth time, for not telling her what she knew about Edmund and Rita. She should have told her she saw them together at different clubs. But she also knew that if the hands of time were turned back, she still won’t tell Sydney, for two reasons.
Firstly, telling her would mean that she also has to tell her how she found out. Karen was an exotic dancer, and it was not something she was proud of even though it was no one’s business, since it paid her bills and she wasn’t harming anyone, well at least not directly. But Sydney looked like someone who had being protected from life’s woe, and Karen didn’t want her to see her as a lose woman, a least not yet.
Secondly, Edmund had never deserved Sydney. He had shady eyes which had told Karen that he was dishonest, even before she saw him cheating on Sydney. Sydney deserved someone who was as trusting and loving as she was, and Edmund was not it.
If she had told Sydney, she would have confronted Edmund, and it would have led to apologies and pleadings, and Sydney’s soft heart would have been deceived. It was better it ended as it did; once and for all. No, Karen wouldn’t have told Sydney if she could turn back the hands of time, but she wished she could have saved her this pain which now raked her sobbing heart.
Making soothing sounds until Sydney calmed down, Karen rocked her back and forth.
She waited as Sydney sniffed back still flowing tears. She needed to talk at her own time and pace.
“I don’t want,” Sydney began, disentangling herself from Karen’s embrace, but still staying close enough to be held again.
“Okay,” Karen replied, not understanding what it was Sydney didn’t want, but reminding herself of the need for patience.
It didn’t take long before Sydney spilled, and Karen’s feeling and facial expression changed from worry to wonder and then to humour. Before long she was shaking with mirth.
“Are you... are you laughing?” Sydney asked. This was one of those times when she and Karen stand starkly different.
Here she was, spilling her guts and afraid, and her roommate who was supposed to be sympathetic was having fun at her expense!
She made to get up in anger, but Karen held her back. “I apologise,” she said, not sounding sorry at all, and it dawned to Sydney that she didn’t say she was sorry, she only said she was apologising.
“Let me go,” Sydney said in mock anger. She couldn’t stay mad at Karen for more than a few seconds. Apart from the fact that it would be wasted anger, Karen was rarely annoying, except she had a good reason to be.
“Okay, I’m done laughing,” Karen said, schooling her face into false seriousness. “So you were crying because you think James is interested in you?”
“Not think, know. I know what I saw!” Sydney exclaimed, feeling silly. “But you can’t blame me, Karen. You know my last experience with love. I don’t ever want to feel as stupid as I felt when I saw that feature article about Edmund and Rita. I don’t.”
“I know,” Karen said, getting off the floor. She was thoroughly sober now that she remembered the betrayal, and how she could have avoided Sydney the pain.
She reached out her hand to pull Sydney up, and in that instant, she knew she had to give her friend some sort of closure. As Sydney took her hand, she began.
“Sydney, there’s something I should have told you a long time ago, but I was protecting myself , and I guess a part of me was playing God.”
Sydney looked into Karen’s eyes, hearing the guilt in her voice. Looking into Karen’s eyes meant looking up, as Karen was taller than her by a full head. Usually she’d joke about how she was straining her neck looking in her eyes, but the guilt in Karen’s voice was not normal.
Karen was a proud woman, and she avoided putting herself in situations where she’d need to be humble to get favours, so Sydney knew something was really wrong.
“What is it?” she asked, feeling apprehensive.
Being who she is, Karen cut to the chase, not giving any preamble. “I knew about Edmund and Rita long before you found out.”
“I don’t understand,” Sydney said, not wanting to understand either.
“I know you understand Sydney,” Karen responded calmly. She saw the hurt slowly filling her roommate’s eyes, but she knew it had to be said.
She took a deep breath and began telling the whole story, even as she knew this could be the end of their friendship, but she hoped it would be the closure she knew Sydney needed.
“No, no, no, this can’t be happening,” Sydney muttered repeatedly as she paced. She was not going to take this seriously. She was not.
She knew she should have come home straight from classes and not try to get over her new hatred for the love park. She should have come straight home.
“What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?” she asked herself, still pacing.
She was so engrossed in her mantra that she didn’t notice Karen looking at her.
Karen was her roommate and has been for three years. They were not really close, but they tolerated each other well. In fact, the reason they were not close is because Karen and Rita didn’t get along, and none of them was ready to try.
Each of them hated the other on sight.
Karen hadn’t liked Edmund too, and that seemed to have annoyed Rita more than it did Sydney. That should have been a sign. Karen seemed to understand Sydney in a way many people never got to, as she was quite observant. She had shown herself a friend when Sydney was yet overwhelmed in grief, calling each day without fail until Sydney came back to school. They were not close yet, but that period had shown Sydney that Karen was a great person. The betrayal from Rita and Edmund had also given her an insight into Karen. If there was anyone who could have guessed that there was something between Rita and Edmund, it was Karen.
She never smiled when either of them where in the house, but she looked positively angry whenever they were both in the house, and many times she was the reason they left early. She never said a word to them, but her countenance made them uncomfortable. Looking back, Sydney suspected that Karen knew something about Edmund and Rita.
Despite their differences, which included their skin and hair colour, they were good roommates to each other and that had made them remain so for three years.
“Should I be worried? You look petrified.” Karen said, halting Sydney’s pacing and weakening her resolve to hold the tears back.
“I’m fine,” Sydney said, breathing deeply to stop the flowing tears. Failing, she crumbled to the floor, “I'm... I'm fine,”
Karen was by her side in an instant, taking her in her arms. “No you are not. You are not, Sydney,” she said in a soothing voice.
Karen wondered if Sydney was still hung up on that two-timing idiot called Edmund. She hoped not; he was not worth it.
As Karen held the crying Sydney, she blamed herself for the umpteenth time, for not telling her what she knew about Edmund and Rita. She should have told her she saw them together at different clubs. But she also knew that if the hands of time were turned back, she still won’t tell Sydney, for two reasons.
Firstly, telling her would mean that she also has to tell her how she found out. Karen was an exotic dancer, and it was not something she was proud of even though it was no one’s business, since it paid her bills and she wasn’t harming anyone, well at least not directly. But Sydney looked like someone who had being protected from life’s woe, and Karen didn’t want her to see her as a lose woman, a least not yet.
Secondly, Edmund had never deserved Sydney. He had shady eyes which had told Karen that he was dishonest, even before she saw him cheating on Sydney. Sydney deserved someone who was as trusting and loving as she was, and Edmund was not it.
If she had told Sydney, she would have confronted Edmund, and it would have led to apologies and pleadings, and Sydney’s soft heart would have been deceived. It was better it ended as it did; once and for all. No, Karen wouldn’t have told Sydney if she could turn back the hands of time, but she wished she could have saved her this pain which now raked her sobbing heart.
Making soothing sounds until Sydney calmed down, Karen rocked her back and forth.
She waited as Sydney sniffed back still flowing tears. She needed to talk at her own time and pace.
“I don’t want,” Sydney began, disentangling herself from Karen’s embrace, but still staying close enough to be held again.
“Okay,” Karen replied, not understanding what it was Sydney didn’t want, but reminding herself of the need for patience.
It didn’t take long before Sydney spilled, and Karen’s feeling and facial expression changed from worry to wonder and then to humour. Before long she was shaking with mirth.
“Are you... are you laughing?” Sydney asked. This was one of those times when she and Karen stand starkly different.
Here she was, spilling her guts and afraid, and her roommate who was supposed to be sympathetic was having fun at her expense!
She made to get up in anger, but Karen held her back. “I apologise,” she said, not sounding sorry at all, and it dawned to Sydney that she didn’t say she was sorry, she only said she was apologising.
“Let me go,” Sydney said in mock anger. She couldn’t stay mad at Karen for more than a few seconds. Apart from the fact that it would be wasted anger, Karen was rarely annoying, except she had a good reason to be.
“Okay, I’m done laughing,” Karen said, schooling her face into false seriousness. “So you were crying because you think James is interested in you?”
“Not think, know. I know what I saw!” Sydney exclaimed, feeling silly. “But you can’t blame me, Karen. You know my last experience with love. I don’t ever want to feel as stupid as I felt when I saw that feature article about Edmund and Rita. I don’t.”
“I know,” Karen said, getting off the floor. She was thoroughly sober now that she remembered the betrayal, and how she could have avoided Sydney the pain.
She reached out her hand to pull Sydney up, and in that instant, she knew she had to give her friend some sort of closure. As Sydney took her hand, she began.
“Sydney, there’s something I should have told you a long time ago, but I was protecting myself , and I guess a part of me was playing God.”
Sydney looked into Karen’s eyes, hearing the guilt in her voice. Looking into Karen’s eyes meant looking up, as Karen was taller than her by a full head. Usually she’d joke about how she was straining her neck looking in her eyes, but the guilt in Karen’s voice was not normal.
Karen was a proud woman, and she avoided putting herself in situations where she’d need to be humble to get favours, so Sydney knew something was really wrong.
“What is it?” she asked, feeling apprehensive.
Being who she is, Karen cut to the chase, not giving any preamble. “I knew about Edmund and Rita long before you found out.”
“I don’t understand,” Sydney said, not wanting to understand either.
“I know you understand Sydney,” Karen responded calmly. She saw the hurt slowly filling her roommate’s eyes, but she knew it had to be said.
She took a deep breath and began telling the whole story, even as she knew this could be the end of their friendship, but she hoped it would be the closure she knew Sydney needed.
