I can be like that with a lot of things too, especially in the past. But I think over time those breaks got longer and longer, and my motivation and mental state worse. I liked to think I had tons of hobbies and interests, but thinking about it now, I don't really do anything. Rarely take pictures now. Rarely watch things but I wouldn't count consumerism anyway. I sometimes play the guitar but I still burnout with that. I can't remember the last time I did any programming. I love reading and have been getting back into that lately which has been nice, but that's coming out of a massive break that lasted months despite daily guilt.

Drawing has been completely different somehow. I just lose track of time as I draw. Learning or just practicing little things. Looking at pictures from others and then figuring out how they did it. I actually feel immersed and excited, like I'm doing something for myself out of pure enjoyment and curiosity and not just to find a reason to pass the time in my miserable existence or make a little extra money. It has consumed me, to the point where I hadn't thought of doing anything else for a week now. I only ended up writing this because I was talking to someone on Discord about it.

I always hate(d) that about myself. The way my interests would differ by the day, almost by the hour. Shifting from one hobby to the next but not really enjoying it or getting that good at it; not really motivated to pursue it beyond something entry level. I think it just shows how much of it was just to pass time.