I'm Adrian, 1956. In the age of 10 (1966) i got larynx cancer. Since 51 years, i live with it and i'm ok.
.... i breath trough a stoma (whole) in my neck. Sounds horrible - but, i do the best, i can cover it with a tshirt
.... i can not speak in a normal way. Now i can whisper and also use a special speakmethod called "esophagus language"
Until about 2005, my stoma was always "unprotected open", but i have covered with a normal tshirt. Nowadays are existing some protection (Atos Medical) - where the stoma is covered with an adhesive plasticring and filter. If people see this, they are not so shocked, maybe only surprised and ask themself: "what is this?". This was my biggest problem to work on myself. I was always thinking "what other people think about me when they see this". This was/is painful for me. Now after so many years, i could improve my self-esteem. Maybe it was different to the patients from today. Mostly they receive this larynx cancer in the age of 50 and above. This brothers and sisters, they know from themself what they did in the life before. But with 10, i did not understand why.
I was growing with this handicap, but i have known from beginning "i can not change this - i can only do the best". This i did. I have study, university, success in job, family - and all of this with a handicaped stoma and voice.
The voice i have trained myself from beginning with a special technique. 1966, at that time where no speech therapist exisited. I have found out myself. I press (swallow) some air from the mouth carefully to the esophagus - not to much, it would end in the stomach, this i dont want - then release it to the mouth. "Normal" people would now burp. Me not, i speak with this little backair. One "burp" can be by beginners one vocal, one syllable - by me is now 4 to 6 words in one piece. So i can speak louder than whisper! It is sounding like i am hoarse/huskily - nowadays i can also speak with emotions - like speaking a little higher and a little deeper in the sound.
Is not for me.
Is for all other patients they receive the diagnose cancer. Some of you have the chance to live longer. If, then you have to work on you, daily! My motto was: "Me? Today i have no time to die".
Adrian
