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Daily Dirty Jokes
@mudpuddle
46
The best dirty jokes!
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http://www.steemit.com/@mudpuddle
Created
2017-12-27 15:20
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mudpuddle
funny
8y
A Couple
A Couple A couple driving home hit and wounded a skunk on the road. The wife gets out and brings it back to the car. "We need to take it to a vet. Its shivering, it must be cold, what should I do?"
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mudpuddle
funny
8y
Teenage Girl
Teenage Girl A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother, "Is it true what Rita just told me?" "What's that?" asks her mother. "That babies come out of the same place
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mudpuddle
funny
8y
Heart Attack
Heart Attack A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store. The store clerk called 911 when they saw him collapse to the floor. The paramedics rushed the man to the nearest hospital where
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Big Chief
Big Chief One day a tiny Apache indian child walked into Big Chief Sitting Bull's Teepee. "Sitting Bull," He asked, "Why does every man in our tribe have such long, complicated names?"
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Two Boys
Two Boys Two boys go into a forest and walk around. Suddenly they see a naked women, then one of the boys run away. The other chases after him. The boy asked "Why did u run away?" The other said
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Six Shots
Six Shots A man walks into a bar and says loudly, "Bartender, six shots!" The bartender looks at him and says, "Wow six shots, whats the occasion?" The man replies , "First
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Small Box
Small Box One day, while Sue was cleaning under the bed, she found a small box. Curious, she opened it and found 3 eggs and 10,000 dollars. A little bit suspicious, she confronted her husband of twenty
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Heart Attack
Heart Attack A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store. The store clerk called 911 when they saw him collapse to the floor. The paramedics rushed the man to the nearest hospital where
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Sex*al Position
Sex*al Position Based on statistics, the most used s*xual position among married couples is doggy style... The husband sits and begs, while the wife rolls over and plays dead.
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Pen*s
Pen*s Teacher draws a pen*s on the blackboard . Does any one know what that is? "Yes," says Tommy. "My dad has two, a small one for weeing and a big one for cleaning the babysitters teeth."
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Two Kid
Two Kids Two kids were talking together. First: "My daddy is so tall that he can touch the clouds in the sky with his hands." Second: "That is excellent. Does your daddy touch something
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Last Day
Last Day Joe is on his last day at work as a mailman. He receives many thank-you cards and monetary gifts along his route. When he gets to the very last house, he is greeted by a gorgeous housewife, who
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Fart
Fart Q: Why do men fart louder than women? A: because they have a microphone and two speakers.
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Sex = Math
Sex = Math Sex is like math: Add the bed Subtract the clothes Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Mailman
Mailman Joe is on his last day at work as a mailman. He receives many thank-you cards and monetary gifts along his route. When he gets to the very last house, he is greeted by a gorgeous housewife, who
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Donkey
Donkey A man is riding aimlessly through the desert on a donkey. He is not hungry or thirsty, because he has a bottomless bowl of fruit. He wanders for about a week and eventually gets pretty horny. He
mudpuddle
funny
8y
3 Kings
3 Kings Teacher: "Can you tell the name of 3 great Kings who have brought happpines and peace into people lives?" Student: " Smo-king", Drin-king and Fuc-king"
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Masturbating
Masturbating Dad: Hey son, if you keep masturbating your going to go blind. Son: Dad im over here.
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Burnt Toast
Burnt Toast What has a slice of burnt toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common? In both cases you wish you took it out a few seconds earlier.
mudpuddle
funny
8y
Little Sally
Little Sally Little Sally came home from school with a proud smile on her face. She told her mum, "Frankie Brown showed me his willy today." Before mum could raise a concern sally said, "It
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