Getting advice from others can be a good thing. If it is beneficial, it will be accepted as it enhances the current situation and can help one to make decisions. We will learn that people who are older are not always wiser. Some people will give advice from the goodness of their hearts. Others have underlying motives which are often beneficial to them if they are being opportunistic. In addition, people who make recommendations have had experiences from their own perspectives - it might not be helpful to someone else. As a result, taking advice from others must be done with discernment but most times only common sense is enough.
Art-Zuid - July 2019
In one’s walks of life - random advice will come from others, sometimes even strangers. It is not always welcomed but what is one to do, only say thank you and move on. Unsolicited advice can be surprising but it can be well-meaning and friendly. Some people genuinely want to help but others feel powerful and important and can become narcissistic. In the end, we will make our own decisions. We are responsible for ourselves and our own behavior and what makes us happy.
In different cultures, there are quotes, many wise sayings and proverbs. I grew up hearing many as a part of everyday life. As a young girl, I looked forward to hearing wise sayings from the older folks whom I loved and respected. I remember summer visits to my grandparents home and the familiar visit to my great grandmother. She would hug us and ask how we were, then delighted in hearing our stories about school and life in the city. She would say,
“I am happy to see you all looking so well and happy. Always remain yourself.”
At first I did not understand - I wondered how people could be anything else but ourselves. I was young then. Soon enough I understood her well.
As a child, I felt that happiness was the common theme of country life. Upon our return from our great grandmother, my grandma would ask about our visit although she could guess how it went. She would reiterate that life is about being happy and we can only really do that by being ourselves. Hmmm I figured that I would do all I can to ensure that I remain happy. I thought I wanted to be like my grandmother. Her language was full of wise sayings - some known by all and others made up as she spoke. These words were powerful and meaningful. Although she’s passed on, I can still hear her telling me many wise things. One of my favorites is still,
Only your best is good enough - you cannot do more.
These famous words from Ole Kirk Christiansen with my grandma’s addition were very soothing when I was stressed and feared failure. In addition, these words instilled a sense of discipline. This saying guided me because I could ask myself whether I was putting in my best effort to achieve my desired outcome or not. I would analyze the situation to determine whether I was really doing my best. If I was - then I would relax. If I really did my utmost within my capacity and level - then indeed I could not do more. Therefore, I would not berate myself since I could not do more. If I didn’t do my best then I knew that I could not be guaranteed a favorable outcome by even my own standards. If I felt that I could do more then I knew what I needed to do next time. I will focus on doing better - by doing my best. Afterall,
Any job worth doing is worth doing well.
It is best not to waste one’ s time - so why not do it well. Of course, no one is perfect but we can try our best - more than that we cannot do - indeed.
My grandmother lived by some of her wise words. That is why they were impactful as I had a role model. I realize why she always appeared happy. She seemed relaxed and living for the moment. There was a sense of “balance” in any action or endeavor. If things didn't go well - there was always another chance. It never seemed like the end of the world. Yes - we must strive for success but we should know our own capabilities/limitations. There is certainly a sense of achievement after working hard at something and then it is accomplished. Knowing what we can achieve via our own efforts causes us to set the bar higher for ourselves after each accomplishment. I think we learn and grow throughout our lives and we are always setting new goals for ourselves - always aiming to be the best at something. They do not need to be professional or financial goals - they can also be spiritual, family, fitness etc. We will always have our own internal compasses guiding our way.
I believe that my grandmother knew that she had a significant impact on the people in her surroundings. However, I don’t think that she would expect that her advice via a commonly used quote would still be spoken about today.
This is in response to Hive Learners prompt - hl-w57e2
The photo is my own
