Postal. What can be said about Running With Scissors' own controversy machine, a series infamous the world over? Often smeared as nothing more than a sick power fantasy murder simulation and brushed off by older gamers as "just a game for angsty teens"; I want to take some time to Talk about Postal 2 this week.
Postal 2 is a first person shooter published in 2003 by Whiptail Interactive. The game rights have since been reclaimed by Running With Scissors, who continue to sell the game on their website and on Steam, after a successful Greenlight campaign.
"Just sign this stupid petition, I've got stuff to do."
I'm sure most of you have seen videos of gameplay on this game, it was sort of a big meme at one point in time; But I'm not sure how many of you have seen what the actual game is like. 99% of videos I've seem on this game are just some kid goofing around on the baby difficulty setting. When you attempt to complete Postal 2 on a higher difficulty setting as intended, that's when the game gets interesting.
Postal 2 follows the unnamed protagonist Postal Dude, an average code monkey living with his wife in small-town Arizona. The story progresses through a 5 day week filled with mundane chores and errands; Such as cashing a paycheck, selecting a christmas tree, and picking up a package from the post office.
Unfortunately, bad luck follows the Dude like a deranged stalker; (as do bullets and bombs, usually) Every location the Dude visits will inevitably burn, due to situations outside his control. The bank gets robbed, the library gets ignited by book burners, and his uncle's house is raided by police!
The Postal Dude isn't just a lone baby twisting in the wind though, as he access to a staggering 35 weapons, including all manner of melee weapons from knives to shovels to stunguns, to his own piss. He's got handguns, he's got shotguns, he's got grenades, he's got napalm, he's the NRA's wet dream and worst nightmare, all in one!
"Here I am, just exercising my second amendment rights, and you people have to freak out on me."
Now if you're doing a hardcore, max difficulty run of the game, you'll need to make careful use of every bullet and bomb at your disposal to clear the game with your ass intact, but for casual playthroughs on difficulties lower than "They Hate Me" you can generally get away with most actions relatively unharmed and unnoticed, thanks to overpowered silent 1shot melee weapons.
That's not to say that enemies will just lay down and die for you though. Police, Taliban forces, and even private citizens will pepper the Dude with hot lead, and if you thought the weapons seemed overpowered when the Dude has them, you haven't seen a pissed off redneck with a missile launcher and a crack problem.
While these enemies will chew through your health and armor, more is always in ready supply, and an experienced player should have no problem finding cover and healing items to sustain themselves through some of the game's longer combat sections. That's right, I said combat sections. It's 2003, baby, all aboard the open world train! Choo choo!
When the Dude isn't gunning his way out redneck sex dungeons at the back of old mills, he can dust off the ol' people skills and have a walk through town; buying goods from the mall, picking up "health pipes" from the local crack dealers, and trying not to get arrested.
"Ooh, a Steme sale. My wallet is ready."
The game has an organic NPC system wherein people will buy goods, use ATM machines, talk and trade with one-another, attack NPCs of rival factions, police attempt to arrest law breakers, it's madness! but fun madness. :)
If I had to knock points for anything else, it would have to be the game's lackluster extended ending expansion pack "Apocalypse Weekend", which adds 2 additional levels that play more like traditional linear first person shooters of the time.
However the 2014 expansion pack, Paradise Lost, is a great expansion pack, adding a new 5 level campaign with all new assets, a bigger map, and a new story. I don't think the pack itself needs a separate review, but rest assured, it's worth the money.
Aaaand that's Postal 2. An under-rated gem that shocked the masses with it's "realistic" physics and gleeful indulgence in violence. While it may shock and disgust moms all around the world, the game is ultimately a harmless joke penned by some dedicated guys who had fun making a fun game together.
And if it isn't fun, why bother?
"I regret nothing."
