Yet another year begins with high expectations of success and accomplishments... So how do I do it differently.
Einstein said: to keep doing things the same way over and over, then to expect "change" is in fact = insanity.
Unfortunately I think that is exactly what nearly sent me crazy...
I vaguely recall last year making a few vows (not writing down a goal or plan) that first AND foremost was that I WOULD BE KIND TO MYSELF and also I would become a BETTER dancer by changing what I was doing and trying different styles, teachers and classes.
There were my lesser vow regarding weight loss and fitness that were achieved to a degree... but I feel more improvement could be made, although being kind to myself means I am not going to stress or judge my progress in a negative manner and see this is an area for me to now refocus on.
MOSTLY I was kind to myself and when I found that if I wasn't or hadn't been kind to myself, this was usually caused by the action of others turning situations into a nightmare for me - THEN I allowed them / the situation to affect my thinking, actions and my image.
HEY, I did a lot "self" work and was drawn into a deep questioning phase (almost became a HERMIT), I realised that it was imperative to undo or repel the toxic karma belonging to others and that I needed to learn to protect my energy and NOT absorb any negative vibrations.
I recently attempted to explain my newly cemented wisdom (I knew the truth but had never worked on it purposefully) to someone and was given a very wide-eyed judgmental response - which made me laugh (Hahaha...a lot).
I acknowledge that not everyone is going to understand MY journey and I also know that if someone had said the same thing to me in the past I may have had a similar reaction. I am not concerned with other's opinion and my aim is to build on my excellent foundation of "SELF KINDNESS".
If I find myself hesitating or unsure about a decision I ask myself this question... "What would your advice be to another" or "Have you put your own welfare first" in other words do for yourself as you would for others. I used to say treat others the way you would like to be treated... then realised I wasn't not treating myself well (enough), if you can't treat yourself well - how can you possibly show others how to treat you in the first place and then maintain that standard as the treatment of those you really care about.
For too long this lack of "understanding" was holding me back... and causing a lot of personal pain and betrayal (both perceived and allowed).
Without these basic fundamentals I was lost and could not move forward no matter how many goals I set for myself or lists I wrote. I am still looking within and taking note of my energy. inner light and intuition (gut feelings) so I can illuminate my world as a path to guide me into a new beginning.
By the end of 2018... I had many people comment that I had become a BETTER dancer and I KNOW I was teaching myself to KIND to myself in most decisions I made.
So here's to a new year (2019) of living and learning - I am going to keep these vows on my list as well as my fitness vow.
My aim for this year will be to establish myself as an entrepreneur (for want of a better term) and a successful business owner, I have already launched my first business https://shhhdanceactive.com/ (which was established near the end of 2018 - with more to come) and I know it is going to be an interesting year with so much to learn.
With this in mind - Moving forward in 2019 I am going to vow to focus on the positives and be grateful for everything in my life. Everyday I am going to treat the moment (day) as my last and see if I can make the profound changes that I feel are possible.
I am aiming to connect to my higher self by operating at a higher vibrational level... this sounds a little fuzzy, but I have been practicing already and it seems to be very effective.
I have also practiced the opening my solar plexus to receive light (white) energy which then recharges me and creates a feeling of vitality and in a way I have tried meditating (although always end up falling asleep). Oddly, I wake up feeling more refreshed than I ever have with more normal night time sleep routine. But I have only just started on this journey and don't know how it works and all (if any) of the benefits that will soon be discovered.
So the "take home" is that I learnt these IMPORTANT lessons:
BE EXTREMELY KIND TO YOURSELF
DANCE be ACTIVE and enjoy MUSIC EVERY DAY
BLOCK and DEFLECT NEGATIVE ENERGY AWAY FROM YOURSELF (do not absorb)
IT IS IDEAL TO LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY but NOT AT ANY PERSONAL COST TO YOURSELF
BE TRUE TO YOURSELF (follow your intuition - gut)
ASK YOUR HIGHER SELF FOR ANSWERS and GUIDANCE
I "KNOW" more than I "THINK"... (my brain / logic doesn't always come up with the best answer)
IT IS OKAY TO WALK AWAY and NEVER TURN BACK
YOU WILL SURVIVE ANYTHING (LIFE's BURDENS / SET BACKS)
So I will continue to dance, because the healing is ongoing and I am feeling revived and strengthened - READY for the next chapter and new adventures.
