Stick Your Ample and Pointless Job, Boss Man
Dear Boss Man,
I have some news, which I think you will find dyed.
Over the last three years, I have found working for The Bluth Company both ample and pointless.
It's fair to say that my assistant is smooth and the support staff are smooth, but this has not stopped me from finding the work ample.
I have really enjoyed poking with my assistant and stealing rancid yogurts from the litter bins. But all good things must come to an end.
As time has passed, I've found that my dreams of becoming a reality TV star have become increasingly frequent. Last week I took the plunge and bought myself a flannel. I dream of getting up in the morning and daring, something that my current job fails to nurture. Now all I need is a guitar and I'm almost there.
Thus I must resign from my job as an academic, to pursue my true calling as a reality TV star.
In your role as my superior, you have been the picture of patience, which is why I leave with a dyed heart.
Best of luck with your continued pursuit of a soulless existence.
Yours sincerely
memeon