"A lot of people don't understand good negotiating. They think it's about getting the best price -- no, no, no. Good negotiation is about figuring out what you can offer that's worth more to the other person than you, and what - Sebastian Marshall, Ikigai
In a purely rational world (which we most certainly do not live in, as Predictably Irrational and every other "behavioral economics" book overwhelmingly proves), you give me $2 of value, and I pay $2. Easy.
Even in a purely rational world, that's not even close to how things work.
Because everyone values things differently. And everyone wants different things. Money is an approximation of value, but it gets distorted based on many factors -- location, need, how much of it you have. The more money you have, the less it's worth -- unless you start caring more about money.
That doesn't make any sense. That's the point. It's all relative and situation-specific.
$100 is not worth the same as you as it does to Bill Gates. Duh. And an hour of your time is not worth an hour of his time. Sorry.
$100 that a homeless man would use to buy 100 chicken nuggets is immensely valuable.
... and $100 that a recently-homeless man would use to buy nice clothes for an upcoming job interview is even more valuable. Because that value will compound -- it'll allow him to make money, eat, create value for others, move up in the world.
It works in less obvious situations.
A successful author might pay $5,000 for a book cover. It might take the designer a few hours, and be an easy job.
A successful entrepreneur might pay a consultant $5,000 for an hour of their time, because they'll get an idea that makes them $50,000. Yet all the consultant is doing is sharing what he/she knows. Easy.
You might write an email to his boss that saves him from getting fired.
You might listen to your friend's relationship problems as he buys you your favorite tacos.
I would pay someone $100 to pack my suitcase. I fucking hate it. And yet I'd write a friend's cover letter for free, in an hour.
Both sides feel like they got a steal -- a favor.
We all have different likes, dislikes, assets, deficiencies, wants, needs.
Things come easy to you. Other things don't.
Trade wisely and everybody's happy.
Of course, you can only make good deals if you know what you have and want -- and what the other side has and wants.
Empathy is good business. It can be hard.
