There was a time I actually felt like giving up as a student, and it was not because I was lazy or that I wasn't serious.... I was just tired of everything and couldn't think of any way to fix things.
It was during my second year in school, and I was already drowning. The workload from my department was too much, and they kept on billing and extorting us. They were always demanding.....from practical reports, to assignments, to group projects, to seminars to tests and all... all in all, it all sums up back to money. My parents were doing their best, but things weren't easy at home also.
One day, after a draining day of practicals and various payments, I returned back to my hostel to find my neighbors eating and gisting by the corridor. I greeted and faked a smile, I was pretending to notice the jollof rice, meat and fried plantain that was before them. I entered and my stomach rumbled, but I only had garri to my name. I locked my door, poured water into the garri as I undress, then I went to take a shower. I returned back to my already soaked garri and ate whole wondering how much longer I could keep doing this.
The next morning, I went to school very early, not because I have any thing serious/important to do, but there was nothing to eat at home. I sat under a big tree beside my department building, and stared at my note without seeing anything. I was just sitting there lost in thought, long last, I decided to send a message to my parents....“I'm tired of everything and I’m coming back home.”
But, something happened. A lecturer came by and said, "I’ve been watching you for a while now, hope everything is fine with you, I know you to be a serious student, so don't stop now...keep going." He didn’t know what I was going through, he didn't ask me anything, but those words…..it hit.
I looked at him as he walked off, I also remembered my mother’s voice from some months back when I was sick “Feranmi, you will finish what you started. GOD didn’t spare you and bring you this far to leave you halfway.” ( She said it in Yoruba) Those were the words that carried me through back then, and now, they came back....anew.
So, I made up my mind there and then, that no matter what, no matter how hard it gets, I would finish. I would keep going. I would drink my garri in the corner of my room, I would walk to class on days when I can't afford transport and I would keep on reading and studying.
And since then, each and every time I felt like giving up, I would picture my graduation day, I would picture my parent's smiling at me, I would picture myself amongst other graduands, I would picture my parents in the crowd, smiling with their eyes laced with tears. And that image became my fuel. With that, the challenges felt surmountable, and look like a stepping to greatness.
Anytime a student tells me they feel like quitting, I look them in the eyes, tell them a little bit of my story and we by saying, "Your story isn’t over yet, you're in the middle, and trust me, the ending is worth reading."
If I could survive those days, nothing can stop you too.
All pictures are mine.
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