This is a very deep topic, at least to me; it is one that brings lots of memories back, and honestly, I didn't even know which to settle for, but then it seems one actually stands out. And this battle happens to be one I can't even wish for anyone, either friends or enemies. It is one that took almost everything called ME with it and made me question everything about life.
So, the hardest battle for me was health-related. I got to deal with a very serious illness, and it wasn't a good time for me at all. It is a time of my life I don't really enjoy talking about. There are times I'd feel I've gotten over it and decide to share my story with someone or write about it, maybe to encourage someone and all, but after that, I'd still feel something.
Well, it started off as a simple health issue, but along the line it began to get deeper, and it dragged for a long time. I spent a long time in the hospital; I did countless tests and treatments and had to undergo multiple surgeries. There are times I just felt tired, tired of life, tired of everything, and tired of seeing my parents, siblings, and loved ones worry and go up and down just because of me. Even my own life was on pause; I couldn't continue with school. My plans and dreams had to wait, and to be honest with you, it got to a time when I felt like, "Will I even survive this...?"
I got so used to pain that I stopped feeling it; the only pain I was feeling wasn't physical anymore. I had undergone about four to five major surgeries and about two to three minor ones with various tests already in the space of a year plus, so what's the pain to feel again? The pain I was feeling was for those around me. What if I don't overcome this? How would they feel after spending all they've got, after borrowing from everywhere? Another pain was if this is how I would continue to live my life... Always on support.
It wasn't an easy time for me, and I can't say it's by my power or strength that I overcame it. Nah, I didn't even have any strength, I cried a lot, I kept to myself a lot, I lost touch with a lot of things, and I became withdrawn, and all. But I'm glad with the family I had; they gave their all and stood by me throughout this period, and I remain grateful to them forever. The journey wasn't easy, but they were present.
This is me using this opportunity to thank God and appreciate my family too. They're the best. I learned a lot from that experience; it opened my eyes to a lot of things, and I can say today that I'm a testimony, a living one. That experience also taught me to be kinder to people because we may not know what the other person is carrying or going through. If I didn't tell you then that I was going through something, you wouldn't know, aside from how lean I became, and if I didn't tell or show you what I've been through as well now, you wouldn't know because a lot of us, this clothes we're putting on is what's covering our scars, pains, and all.
馃尮
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