I had a relative working for one of the ministries. He was a big fish who had invested largely in real estate.
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One day I needed money to buy a book. I hurried to his office and was quite glad to have met him alone in the office. He was calm with legs spread tiredly on the table.
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"Good afternoon Sir," I said politely and sat on the couch.
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He returned my greeting with a mere wave of the hand.
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I was just going to tell him my problems when he simply pointed at the refrigerator and said I should help myself with a bottle of Coke. I took the drink and proceeded to tell him my problems. I said I needed money to buy some books.
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In that calm mien he reminded me that he was only a civil servant and that things were bad for his ilk.
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He told me his own pathetic story and made me feel glad to accept the fifty naira note he gave me.
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Months later, I was there again and a similar scenario played out again.
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After the second visit I vowed never to go see him again. But that was feeble threat. One day on my way to school I decided to check on him. A bottle of coke at least wasn't entirely a bad idea.
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His secretary was grinning from ear to ear.
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"Your uncle is in." He announced.
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But no sooner had my foot stepped in than my ears got shocking vituperative remarks from my kinsman.
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"You again!" he fired and literally took a dive from his seat towards me. "The last time you came I gave you fifty thousand Naira. Don't tell me you are here again for money."
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Engulfed in bewilderment, I let my gaze float around the office in a broken circle. That was when I saw the ladies. Beautiful girls, three of them a shade older than me.
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Momentarily it struck me that the soon-to-be sexagenarian was putting up all that drama just to impress his guests. I sensed that he wasn't expecting me to let him down.
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Lowering my eyes I improvised. "I am sorry to bother you again uncle. I had an accident in Keffi with the Nisan Altima you bought for me and I need just twenty five thousand naira to fix it... "
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My line obviously was impressive because I noticed a glow spread across his face. The glow the girls could not have seen. Only the two of us with our Creator knew that we were both cheesy liars.
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He fired in retaliation to my earlier remark.
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"You see!" he spread out his hands. "If you can't use that vehicle, go and park it at home. The ones I gave to your cousins are still in good condition."
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One of the girls remarked admiringly that he was not only rich but extremely generous. The others nodded in support and my kinsman beamed in excitement.
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"About fifty of them are on scholarship and I take care of them all." He bragged. Turning to me, he quickly added: "Go to my secretary to give you a cheque of thirty thousand naira ."
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He opened his drawer and pulled out a wrap of fifty naira notes and flung it at me. "Add this for your fare. "
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Five thousand naira for my Waka-pass role. My first ever Nollywood movie!
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Of course his secretary gave me nothing but I was like a king when I walked out of of his office with my treasure that afternoon.
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I have no idea what became the fate of those girls but I will be forever grateful to them for making it possible for me to buy a lot of books : some of which are still in my collection.
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THE WILDERNESS EXPERIENCE by Japheth Prosper
NB: This book will be released this month, book for a copy
