As an Overseas Filipino Worker (OFW) life is really difficult. It takes courage for us to go to abroad for our family. You have be strong since the only consolation we can get is we can send money to our love ones in the Philippines. We can buy them food or send appliances that we can not afford if we are only in the Philippines. We can send big cargo boxes to them.
As what we heard always "WE ARE HEROES " of our country. But is it really advisable to go abroad or away from them? When relationship of your family is concern. That money or time matters?
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In my case I am a single parent. I left my only son to my mom and dad but the one who's taking care of him is the daughter of our previous helper, which is considered as our relative already. They are with us since i was nine years old. I left him when he was 1 - 1/2 month old and since then i am only visiting him yearly since we are allowed to take leave once in a year. Every month i am sending them the money for his daily needs. When I went home before his 1st birthday i caught his reaction when he saw me. At first we was hesitant to come, he glanced first to his Nanay Remy, his nanny, i think asking for approval if he is allowed to come to someone that is stranger to him. If we was crying i can't even let him stop and instead he chose to be with his nanny. You know the feeling of a mom that you should be the one cuddling him, letting him sleep in your arms but instead asking your name, he preferred to be with his nanay. One time he woke up 5:00 pm (we let him sleep in the afternoon) and it was me and him only in our room. The normal reaction of a child is to cry and cry but of course he's asking for his nanay and he said,
I'm sad..i'm sad
Sometimes i kept on asking is this the right thing that i should do? What if i stayed only in the Philippines what future i can give to him? I know for sure some of you will say "get a job and be with your son no matter what". And others will say, "you won't get the salary you have now if you are in your country, i'm sure your son he will understand". I am so thankful that Nanay Remy knows how to take care of him, discipline him (because i saw that he is afraid of her when his Nanay Remy raised her voice) but i am still thinking if he loves me the way he loves his Nanay Remy? I know i can provide the things that he needs but mostly will say "its really different if you are the one takes care of him, your relationship between mom and son, your bonding".
(Photo from my album)
Now I am in the middle of confusion. I am just hoping that my son will understand whatever my decision because i know i'm doing this for his future. And he really matters to me..my son only :)
