This post is both in English and Spanish, you can go directly to español by clicking HERE
There are things in life that only happen to me and Daffy Duck! I have such a strange luck, because I win prizes for which I wasn't even participating.
I must confess that love is one of them. I have not been a woman to be on the hunt for a partner, but I am an easy target for predators on the loose.
At first I was a little afraid, now at my age, it makes me laugh to see them try to conquer my heart.
Here are three of the most bizarre love attempts I can remember (because there are more)
Old age love
There is no doubt that love has no age, but when you can already be the father or mother of the person you like, I think you have to think twice before paying attention to the words of cupid.
By then I was 26 and the gentleman was about 60, it started as a declaration of love that turned into harassment, and ended with my fist in his face after he tried to hold me in an elevator to force me to talk to him.
A private driver
On my trip to Rio de Janeiro on business, I had a driver assigned by the company to drive me around the city.
At first his cordiality seemed a bit exaggerated, but then I understood that people in that city are extremely helpful, so I didn't care.
But when he started asking me if he could stay with me in the evenings, I became alert.
First I told him that I didn't understand (although I did it perfectly), then I had to tell him that I would report him, and in the end, I asked to change him on the grounds that he couldn't speak Spanish and I didn't understand his English.
A mute
At the place where I work, I have seen many deaf mute people who go shopping. It is a dilemma trying to serve them, unless they have in writing what they want to buy.
There is one in particular who manages to speak a little, and with some difficulty I can understand him, which helps a lot.
But, not long ago, he comes up to me to ask for something, I see him counting the money and I expect him to look at me so that he understands when I ask him. What I didn't expect is that when he sees me he wink me and when he leaves he makes me a heart with the fingers of his hands.
That's when I said to myself... ¿it can't be... again?
I think I should apply the Cinderella method and leave some shoes on wrong, so I can finally find a prince and not these bizarre crush.
Español
Hay cosas que en la vida solo me pasan a mi y al pato Lucas! y es que tengo una suerte tan extraña, porque gano premios para los que ni siquiera estaba participando.
Debo confesar que el amor es una de ellas. No he sido mujer de estar de cacería de pareja, pero soy blanco fácil de los depredadores que andan sueltos.
Al principio me daba un poco de temor, ahora a mi edad, me provoca risa verlos tratar de conquistar mi corazón.
Aquí les presento, los tres intentos amorosos más bizarros que recuerdo (porque hay más)
Amor de la tercera edad
No cabe duda que el amor no tiene edad, pero cuando ya puedes ser el padre o madre de la persona que te gusta, creo que hay que pensárselo dos veces antes de hacerle caso a las palabras de cupido.
Para entonces yo tenía 26 y el señor unos 60, empezó siendo una declaración de amor que se convirtió en acoso, y terminó con mi puño en su cara luego de tratar de retenerme en un ascensor para forzarme a hablar con él.
Un chofer privado
En mi viaje a Río de Janeiro, por asuntos laborales, tuve un chofer asignado por la empresa, para movilizarme por la ciudad.
Al principio su cordialidad me parecía un tanto exagerada, pero luego entendí que las personas de esa ciudad son extremadamente serviciales, así que no me preocupaba.
Pero cuando empezó a preguntarme si podía quedarse conmigo en las noches, ya me puse en alerta.
Primero le decía que no entendía (aunque lo hacía perfectamente), ya luego tuve que decirle que lo denunciaría, y al final, pedí que me lo cambiaran alegando que no sabía hablar español y yo no le entendía su inglés.
Un mudo
En el sitio donde trabajo, he visto muchos sordo mudos que van a comprar. Es un dilema tratar de atenderlos, a menos que lleven por escrito lo que desean comprar.
Hay uno en particular que logra hablar un poco, y con alguna dificultad logro entenderle, lo cual ayuda bastante.
Peeero, no hace mucho, se me acerca a pedir algo, yo lo veo contando el dinero y espero que me mire para que entienda cuando le pregunto. Lo que no esperaba es que al verme me pica el ojo y al irse me hace un corazón con los dedos de las manos.
