As the holiday approaches, my heart keeps beating fast like I am going to have a heart attack and sincerely, THAT IS STRANGE!!!!
It’s clearly because I am scared of going home with nothing, no Gifts for my mom, nieces and friends back at home, no money even. I don’t know if anyone else feels that way but its shameful to go home empty handed.
This year has been really something, from making my first million in real estate to losing all of the money to bad investment and improper financial planning, to not making any sale since August, thereby leaving me with nothing to even start 2022 with. I am trying to be hopeful but as the year draws nearer to its end, I can’t help but worry. Tell me I am not alone in this please inserts crying face
I am just 23 years old, trying to scale a business in real estate, and taking care of myself; which is already so much work and truthfully, my mom does not ask me for anything, she just wants me to be okay, she gets money from my older siblings so no one is asking me for anything whatsoever, so why am I putting myself under so much pressure?
COULD THIS BE ANXIETY?
I am writing this paragraph 4hours after my last sentence. I got overwhelmed and couldn’t write at that point, so I decided to talk to someone to feel better.
I just got off the phone with a friend of mine and while we were talking, I couldn’t hold back the tears from rolling down my cheeks, I let it all out, I told him everything that I am feeling right now, he just listened and encouraged me.
Honestly, phewwwwww! My heart feels lighter (you can tell, because, look at me writing).
I don’t know how to handle anything going on in my life right now, but I hope each day feels better than previous, I hope to sleep tonight, and wake up feeling even better tomorrow.
I wish I could write more on this post and make it over 500 words, but that’d be me not being real.
It ends here, I am glad I could come here to pour my heart out.
Thanks for reading
