That must really suck matey.
I don't have kids so can't truly appreciate exactly how much, but I can understand it.
Apart from my Dad, my entire family was pretty much against me. ( i.e against thinking for yourself, and just following whatever BS was dished up).

So I went off traveling, and only returned for 4 years to look after my dad while he was dying. Then I fucked off again.

I'm not sure how you go forwards on this, tbh.
(getting a backpack and buggering off for 20 years is probably out of the equation. lol)