Inspired by true events..........
"I guess I really did it this time. " Those were the words I said to myself as it dawned on me, that there was no going back, the deed had been done, I had to live with the pain, the shame. I couldn't talk to anyone about it, not even my best friend who I told everything. How would he look at me? It kept me up at night, I didn't leave my room, I was seriously depressed, everyone could see, but I couldn't tell them why. There are some things you can't speak of. I blamed myself constantly. I wondered why it had to happen to me. But, no answers came. Those answers never came.
The days dragged on, and weeks turned into months, and I was going downhill real fast. I decided one day that I wasn't going to continue living like this. I started my trip back uphill. I joined a peer group that could help me, I read books, listened to good music that healed my mind, learnt to be happy. I became less depressed, found new hobbies, started going out again. I didn't tell my best friend, he didn't have to know. But I'm better, I live better now.
If this situation sounds familiar to you, you've been in a situation like this, or you're currently in one, I'll advice you to change the way you think.
Listen, who you are is not what you did. You're still INNOCENT. Everyone messes up at one time or the other. Some mistakes cannot be corrected, but you gotta learn from it and live better. You're not a failure. You only are, if you stop persisting. You're 40 but you're still growing up. Forgive yourself, Get up, Get help, Get a new hobby, speak to a counselor, if you must. Join a peer group that can help you. You'll find your way again, the guilt will pass. You can LIVE AGAIN .
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