'shhhhh, don't you ever raise your voice at your father' ! Mum said with a hushed voice. There was this urgency in her voice and a trace of fear.
'mummy I'm saying the truth'
'Didn't I just tell you to close your wide mouth? ' this time around she was screaming and her voice was shaky.
I heard dad slam the door cussing me, and muttering something about little children growing wings and having guts.
I retired to my room and planned my grand escape. I knew I was going to run away, from dad, Imo (my cousin) and Kalu (the help), I just needed a little pushing, I was waiting for the last straw that will break the Carmel’s back.
Two days to my 9th birthday, I remember staying up as late as 9pm with mum and Kalu in the kitchen, mum was preparing chin-chin, I knew I wouldn't taste it if I'd gone to bed because mum would take everything to her kiosk for sale. After everything, mum retired to her room.
I didn't sleep early, I was trying to complete 'Chike and the River' , a storybook I borrowed from the library the previous day. I was slightly dozing and battling to stay awake when I felt someone's hand on my thighs.
'who's that? '
Shhhh, it's me Imo, don't shout. He placed his palm on my mouth in a manner that I couldn't emit any sound.
Imo was my paternal cousin, he used to sleep on a mat on the floor of my room. I didn't like him, especially the way he used to look at me, infact once he'd winked at me while I was eating and I completely lost appetite. He had grim facial features and barely talked.
Now that I think of it, I hated him.
So, Imo had inserted his hand in my pants and kept thrusting hard. It was painful. I cried that night. He said he'll kill me if I tell anybody. I was scared.
On my 9th birthday night, Kalu followed me to the backyard when I went to pee, he pinned me to the wall and molested me. He kept muttering things like 'you'll like it' , it wasn't as painful as before.
When I was 10 and almost ready to go to secondary school , I really wanted to be a boarder so I could run away from Imo and Kalu but dad didn't want me to be a boarder, my first sister died in a boarding school,so non of his children will ever go to a boarding school.
I cried bitterly, I told mum what was going on and how My cousin and the help took turns in molesting me. Mum was so angry and kept beating me for not telling her on time. The next day when I came home from school I couldn't find any of them in the house. I was so happy.
My happiness was however short lived when I clocked 15, I was in ss2. It was dad's turn to molest me, poor me. I didn't know the phrase 'there's time for everything' could have a real meaning.
The first night dad came to my room. I felt strong hands on my breast, I opened my eye in the pitch dark room, it was dad. I pretended to be asleep. I let him continue. In the morning I told mum everything that happened and how I couldn't scream because I felt embarrassed that my own father could do that to me.
Mum didn't believe me, 'if your plan is to spoil my marriage, it will not work, tell them you didn't see me at home' ! she said adjusting her wrapper.
I know the fact that her husband was a paedophile and no different from Imo and Kalu was hard for her to accept, it was hard for me too.
I needed to talk to someone, I found myself talking to my Physics teacher during break, I didn't know when I followed her after the class, 'my dad has been having sex with me' I blurted out.
'Whatttttt??? Her jaw dropped.
She hurried me to the coffee room. 'what do you mean sweetie'
I narrated everything to her, including Imo and Kalu's part in stealing my innocence.
Miss Felicia the physics teacher held me by the shoulder with both hands.
'you have to confront your dad!
Huh?
''you're going to confront your dad sweetie, tell him he shouldn't molest you again, you're no longer a kid, you should be able to talk to your parents about what you like and what don't like, stand-up for yourself sweetie".
When I got home, dad was with mum in the parlor, I tried to talk to dad, about what used to happen almost every night. To my surprise he said he didn't know what I was talking about and started cussing me, Mum tried to hush me,
'close your wide mouth with immediate effect! She screamed.
Dad carried the car keys and left the house.
These people can't be my biological parents, I'm living in a night mare!
I'm done parking my things, I'll leave before dawn and i know wont be the first kid to run because of molestation
