But there were a lot of factors involved. For one, my mother was not exactly the kind to lay down and let something like having an unplanned child ruin her life. She was to me a person of living in the fast-paced of the times, and having a baby simply was not on the list of things she wanted to do with her life.
So, I knew I had to go back and stop them from going out that night. I had figured out where they would meet and figured out that the likelihood was very high that she might just not make it this time, if I was unable to get her out of there.
So I went back.
I remember having this feeling of being like there was a huge weight on my shoulders – my main reason for going back was to save my mother, and yet I knew that in doing this, I was going to lose her for good. That thought bothered me the most.
I arrived on my mother's side of the road. I smirked, surprised how much the landscape had changed. All the houses looked old and rundown, and the few trees that had grown over the years were all dying. I brushed the stray thought away because right then I had a much bigger problem to deal with.
I rushed towards them as my mother caught a glimpse of me. I was as fast as lightning, and I grabbed her around the waist before she could get off the ground. I quickly realized I had caused a twig to be stuck in her hair as she cried out in shock, and as I fed it to her I spoke, "I'm sorry I'm late but I really needed to come back and-".
"Mary, I need a drink mother dear. Can I buy you a drink s'il vous plait?"
She looked up at her friend, confusion on her face as to how she could already know the person I was standing next to. She didn't want to believe me but I refused to leave.
"Yes, yes, I would love a drink with Mary."
She looked back at me, and I had the realisation that my mother could understand me now, perhaps even better than I could understand her. She had simply for some strange reason, heard me when I said those words and believed that I was her daughter.
I sighed.
I had messed up again.
I began panicking. It seemed like my powers of controlling time were in jeopardy. The things that were supposed to happen were happening the first time I went back, yet they were even happening now.
"Well, I'm on a diet, remember?" my mother said, smiling slightly as she thought of her friend.
"Oh come now! It's not healthy to go on a diet. You must drink at least one drink Mary."
I sighed.
I had about five minutes to stop them from leaving.
"Leaving in five minutes, Mary," they were saying.
"I'll be right there," my mother replied.
She looked at me.
"You know, you don't look much like me."
For some reason, it was like she had never seen me before. I decided to say something I am sure anyone else would have said, "Of course not, I'm a time-traveller and I've come back here to change what happened between you and my father."
Her face grew sad but she seemed to accept it as fact.
"But you have to go, this time, and it's already happened. You can't go back now and change things."
"But," I began. "I'm able to go backwards and forwards through time to do all sorts of things, right now I'm able to change the outcome… I can't stop the cycle of time now, I can't."
I shook my head as the reality of it all sunk in.
"The gravity of the situation is really quite unbelievable… but I need to make this request again. I need you to go with him to the bar and buy him a drink, go on and do it. I need this to happen."
"I can't," she replied. "I'll stay here, I don't want to go to the bar with that guy. I don't trust him. He looks like the kind of person who cheats a lot, and was un-loyal. Why wouldn't I trust him?"
"He's a guy who will treat you wonderfully, he will love you, he will even have children with you, and yet you would not get a drink with him?"
"I don't want a drink, I'm on a diet honey. What's your name by the way? Mary? You remind me of my friend Mary. She's coming over with me and I don't want to be alone with some stranger."
My heart dropped.
I stared deep into my mother's eyes as she spoke. She locked eyes with me, and I wished I could go back in time to help the people I hadn't managed to save. I hoped they would have survived their meeting, and that they would still work out the relationship.
"Please don't be sad, Mary. We had everything we could ever want. We had a wonderful life. I loved you and you loved me. It was the happiest time of my life, so you can't ask me to leave my mum and go with some stranger. I don't want any children. I just don't want to do this anymore."
I began crying, as time seemed to slow down.
I knew the only way I could help my mother and make the process easier for me was to convince her to agree to go with the random guy. I knew what he meant to do, I knew what the outcome would be if he went back and did certain things.
"Where is your drink?"
"I don't know. I just don't want to go with you."
She looked out of the window. He had not managed to find the two minutes she had spoken about. In fact, it had turned into fifteen.
It was time. I knew what I had to do with my powers.
"Mother," I began, gently but firmly grasping her hand. "Don't ruin the lives of more people. You will go with him, and what will happen will happen, but I don't want you to feel the same way anymore. You've never really understood, but I want to change that, and I want you to… I want you to go back with him and have some time together, and not live a life with regrets, okay? Do it for me?"
She looked slightly unsure but I continued, "I know it was a long time ago, and that things haven't changed that way. You will go through with this and follow him and have this fun little trip, and I will not interfere with time in any way and I will not come back to visit you if you've reached your destination."
I stopped talking. I stared deep into her eyes. This was the most difficult thing I had ever had to do, and I didn't want to mess it up.
One week later, her friend called her and told her she was late.
"I just don't want to go. I don't trust him. He'll cheat on me. I don't want to go on a trip with any stranger, so please don't make me."
The phone went dead.
As I watched my mother walk away with him, I knew one thing, I could not change that.
