Great to see this deep and thoughtful post. Must be some great coffee you're drinking! 😄

Let me propose two alternate views to the stories in the bible. They're not meant to be taken literal but are simple parables to get a point across about different aspect of existence such survival, security, sexuality, morality, etc. The stories don't seem to make sense because they're not meant to, as long as they get the point across.

My second view, or rather that of Isaac Newton, is that the Bible is an alchemical document. In Newton's time, alchemical documents were coded in colorful language. Newton, for instance, called antimony the "menstrual blood of the sordid whore." His notebooks are filled with fantastical passages using this secret code. When you translate them into plain language, you realize, they're just chemical recipes. He seemed to believe the Bible was a coded language for alchemical formulas, which he tried to work out from the Book of Revelations.

So, if Newton was right, then maybe Adam and Eve are code words for chemicals like mercury and gold, while the snake refers to a formula or procedure conducted on Adam and Eve (hence the flickering tongue of the snake). Seen in that light, then the story of creation is just a chemical recipe, but to create what?

Crazy, right? 😇