Many years ago when I was in my childhood, I looked up to becoming an adult with much anticipation. I envied the freedom and independence associated with adulthood. I wasn't comfortable with someone monitoring all my moves. I wanted to be free. I wanted to be the commander of my own affairs.
I was making moves to join older people to do things considered not for my age. If my uncles and aunties were going out to a function, I wanted to follow them and be recognized as an attendee and not just a boy that was brought to the occasion by someone. Whenever I was pushing for this ideology, my uncle would laugh and advise me to be patient and come of age first.
Another thing that I didn't take as a child was when a younger person was mistakenly considered to be older than me. Even if I am older by one day, I wanted the other person to see me as a big brother. I flared up at such scenarios many times. I did all these to display my eagerness to join the adulthood club.
Unknown to me that what is after six is more than just seven. I grew up into adulthood and the other side of the divide was laid bare to me. It was then I realized that what I called freedom in adulthood is not really freedom. Rather, freedom is associated with childhood. As a child, I had the freedom to demand from my parents whatever I needed ranging from dresses, money, choice of food and so on. I didn't see it as a privilege then. I took it as my right, sometimes arrogantly.
I remember having problems with my mother whenever I returned from school to eat gari (baked cassava flour) as my lunch. My mum would be begging me to take it after I refused to eat. I never knew how difficult it was for my parents to provide food for my siblings and I. My parents handled my excesses with love.
I am presently feeling the heat of what my parents went through that time. As a husband and father now, I know what it takes to be a responsible adult. The gari that I used to reject as a child is something that I now take voluntarily with smiles over my face.
I understand that childhood is rather accompanied with freedom. A responsible adult is not really free. You are controlled by the bills in front of you to settle.
Adulthood is however fulfilling. When I turn and see my family doing fine, I become the happiest person on the planet earth.
Another aspect of childhood that I missed is the way a child's mind is free of trouble. You only live the kind of social life that your parents introduced you to. No pressure to measure up with others in the society. If I complained about taking gari, I was only wishing it was rice or beans (food that were among the family menu).
However, as an adult, you want to do well and measure up to some standards. The plan of continuous improvements remains in your heart. You think of today, tomorrow and years to come. Life isn't just about today. This comes with a lot of pressure.
I do think of the possibility of returning to childhood atimes. Crazy right? Time is irreversible.
Adulthood entails many challenges but one good thing with it is that it provides one the opportunity to contribute to the advancement of society. It is fulfilling.