Sorry to hear about your loss. It's the hardest part of being a pet lover especially when they have been part of our lives for so long. I had to put down my old girl of 19 and a half years old a few years back. It was the only humane thing left to do, it broke my heart and I could tell she didn't want to go and wanted to spend every last minute she had with me but she was deteriorating fast and only had a few days left anyway. Merlin will be waiting for you on rainbow bridge until you can be reunited again.