Who are we truly behind a mask, billions of people wear a mask just to fit into a world where others are also wearing a mask, it begs the question to know the sincerity of individuals under a mask, if most of us are chameleons trying to blend into a society to be seen as suitable or acceptable by the society then what does the true nature of mankind looks like, when unfiltered.
The mask is just a simple but fake performance, it helps people hide emotional scars, helps to fit into social gatherings while fostering fake confidence, telling ourselves we are "okay", while performing a success story online and hiding any form of true vulnerability.
I know times I have been a happy friend filled with false energy, trying to cheer my friends on, while I am going through some difficult moments in my life, even when I am recently going through a break up, I had to bottle up my feeling because showing any signs of emotions would automatically label my personality as a "weak man" or a "soft guy". When people ask me if I am okay or fine, I just smile and say I am going great but deep down I am mentally unstable and devastated.
Now the main reason why I was hiding my emotions or how I actually felt was because, I don't want to be seen as guy who got dumped by a woman he committed 2 good years of his life to, right from campus to NYSC, I feared the judgement of people, how they would laugh at me, gossip and the fear of being rejected for not being man enough, this brought about the desire for acceptance for me, we humans naturally wants to belong to a society where we feel welcomed and accepted, so we bend our inner selves to meet societal expectations because we know that the society rewards perfection, being the untouchable persona and makes jest of the vulnerable.
Most people are suffering from trauma or past experiences, this is what I've learnt from childhood to stay calm and acts like nothing happened because expressing emotions is unsafe.
When I put away my mask, I am someone who makes mistakes, who is not perfect, who overthinks, always having self doubt but filled with hopes and dreams, but I can't let people see me weak because I fear their judgement and criticism, most people avoid those who appear not to have figured out life and embrace those on a similar acceptable mask, but the truth we all know is, no one has it figured out yet, but we still pretend like we all know what we are doing.
Looking at the effects of wearing a mask on individuals and the society at large. One thing I have known myself for is being lonely, I love to isolate myself from the world because I do not like to force my energy, but once I find myself in a public space, I start my performance and charm my way into people, so I can be accepted, the most difficult part about that is anxiety, the performance would later unfolds and drops like domino. We all appear like a well-connected society but emotionally we are disconnected.
I would like to drop some few ideas on how to improve the society and lead a better world where we don't have to constantly wear a mask to fit in.
In the contemporary society we find ourselves, if we can encourage individuals to be real with their feelings and identity, I believe it would create a much more unique and diversified world filled with genuine people and not scripted performance. I believe we can only do this when we create space for genuine conversations without judgement or stigma, allowing individuals to show their vulnerability. This will help promote real human connections over appearance.
In conclusion the mask we wear only shield's us for a little period of time and starts to unfold with time. Building a healthier society starts with individuals having genuine conversations and feeling safe not to be seen as confident, strong, perfect but as a human being with flaws, downtime, imperfections, and self-doubt.
