I'm setting myself a challenge to see if I can go for a week without saying, "Fine."
Why?
Because I watched Mel Robbins' TEDx Talk entitled, "How to stop screwing yourself over."
She said that she regarded "Fine" as the ultimate four-letter word. When people ask us how we are and we say, "Fine," it's a lie. Not only is it a lie to them but, worst still, it's a lie to ourselves. It's a sign that we've given up.
We have needs, for exploration, for growth. Ideas bubble up inside of us. But then, instead of listening to our inner yearnings, we say, "I'm fine." That's like hitting our inner snooze button. It's our cop out.
This also tends to lead to passive-aggressive behavior. People do things we resent, we don't address the issues with them, and we stuff our emotions. But then we take it out on them in subtle ways. We don't do what we said we would, we're late, and so on.
All of this ties in with the topic of radical honesty that I've been interested in recently.
It occurred to me that if I was conscious of my default tendency to say, "Fine," and if I substituted more precise descriptions, it would help me to be more aware.
And I think all progress starts with awareness.
They say a journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.
Yes, that's true. But, even before I take the step, I need to know that I want to get from here to there.
So, to get a clearer picture of where I am now, what my "here" is and what my "there" might be, I will substitute more honest words than, "Fine."
