When I was in school I used to have a friend whose boyfriend was and is still into fraud. We were very close (that lady, her boyfriend and I) before he started it (fraud), and in a short while he made it big. Made some real money. The guy was always coaxing me to join and make money for myself too. It was during a time when I needed money to take care of my school bills. It was one hell of a crazy bear market in 2019.
However, that wasn't who I was. I was comfortable with being able to manage what I had and this helped me accept the limit of my affordability and established a mental equilibrium between what I could get (financially) and what I couldn't. Apparently, he was a really good friend better than even people I thought were my friends, but the nature of his livelihood created a rift among us. He was always after money, he wanted to always make more of it, and even if I felt he had more and was comfortable, he still couldn't quit.
He and his girlfriend and now married, they're expecting a baby, and they have a union and healthy life, most of the things I could give everything to have (except the illegal money) but yet, this guy was still after more money. While it'll be easier to judge him, I've come to understand that one's biggest nightmare is what they fight not to overshadow them throughout their lives. He had seen some mind-bending level of poverty, he struggled through school and worse torn clothes.
He now drives a Lexus but yet poverty still scares him. I could basically see a similarity here. In my situation my health has made me paranoid and even if I should probably let the worry of my health go for the sake of my mental health. I've lost all my immediate nuclear family, and the pain of being in that "lonely place" has made me lose myself. Of course, for an outside, this doesn't seem like a huge deal. For this guy, the fear of poverty keeps plunging him into fraud, drugs, alcohol, and more risks. He may have drawn a line that he didn't think he could cross, but then I feel that the fear of poverty which is inbuilt could alter this.
Having that much money for him brings a sense of assurance. It was like having money to spend today and having more to spend the next day. Not having that creates fear. It's like a placebo effect. The truth is that we always underestimate the essence of life's diverse placebo effect. Sometimes having the assurance that something brings even if it doesn't show any significant impact helps the mind to keep going.
It's like having money in the bank, while you cannot physically access, the money, the thought that you can do any transactions at your beck and call is enough to still assure you that you have money. It's just like many do. They make plans for their investment and make plans for tomorrow without really knowing the parameters that need to be in place to make their plans work. However, things like good health and a sound mind create a placebo effect or a greater certainty.
When in reality things like an accident, a venereal disease or an ailment can happen even when the chances are still low. In life, people thrive with the believability that they're good to go, especially when their vitals are good; psychological, mental, health, and otherwise. It's different when you're coming from a place where you do not what to return to.
Basically, I do not care for most of the things I used to, and this is because the idea or belief of certainty is no longer there, the things that make them matter are no longer there. While people work to enrich themselves, but in reality most of the things they're trying to enrich aren't even what matters most in life. But we don't know these.
For this guy in question, I still keep close contact. He was suggesting to financially assist me, but then, I didn't want to push that button. He struggles with his demons and even if anyone on the outside will call him a monster for being a fraudster. I know his demons, I've faced them, and he owns his life.
Interested in some more of my works