Freewrite, prompt primates
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At NaNoWriMo
Dr. Francis Hazeltine had acquired ten thousand monkeys for Nanowrimo.
Surely the chimps won’t be missed, nor the lemurs. It was front page news through November, but it’ll all be old news by December. Let the zoo keepers scratch their heads. Let the FBI investigate.
The dear Dr. Hazeltine tied each of the ten thousand primates to a desk with – not a typewriter – but a computer keyboard and screen. He jabbed nasty electrodes into their brains.
A zap for whenever they didn’t type. A zap for when the typed gibberish, “asikoerf093mx`f”. But a zing to the pleasure centers when they typed three or more coherent words in a row. “HaPPy Duck Kettle”. Ten thousand monkeys, chimps, baboons, macaques, and more would surely come up with something passable for Nanowrimo, even if old Hazeltine would have to cut-n-paste from every one of their files.
He fed them through overhead banana dispenser, traveling on rails, their seats were monkey toilets, (gross I know), but he thought of everything. Even massive ventilation fans for the monkey stench of 10,000 of them in a converted warehouse.
At the end Dr. Francis Hazeltine got his novel for November.
Hot vinegar xylopo{ne ketcHup, lace, lice ! loOse went the goose. Returned a hat to walmurts on sale. Customer bad hair cut day. ?More honey in your moose mr. Pickle!
His was no better nor worse than most attempts at a first novel in 30 days.
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